Photos
Quotes
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Minna Häkkinen : I am sorry, Selina. I have a commitment to the principles of truth and justice.
Selina Meyer : As the former President of the United States, truth and justice can gargle my balls.
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Selina Meyer : I wanna sound like Bono trying to impress his own reflection in the mirror.
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Selina Meyer : Guys, listen I just need to get in a room with Lu, one on one, so I can change his mind about supporting me for president. Face to face, I can convince anyone of anything.
Ben Cafferty : That's not true.
Kent Davison : Incorrect.
Selina Meyer : You're both wrong.
Ben Cafferty , Kent Davison : You're right.
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Selina Meyer : Lu developed a real hankering for Finnish furburger back at Camp David. He eye-fucked her so bad he got retinal herpes.
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Minna Häkkinen : So my last three lovers are complaining that my dirty talk is both incessant and soporific.
Selina Meyer : Maybe you should let them choke you.
Minna Häkkinen : You think they would rather choke me than listen to me talk?
Selina Meyer : I can only speak for myself.
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Murman Shalikashvili : I recently bought an English football club.
Selina Meyer : Oh, wonderful!
Murman Shalikashvili : Leeds United. No English players, so pretty good team.
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Keith Quinn : We'll tell the whole world how you vaporized a DRA leader's wedding with Hellfire missiles and also took a huge laser-guided shit all over Pakistani sovereignty...
Selina Meyer : [Cuts him off] OK, A, that never happened. And B, that footage is highly classified.
Keith Quinn : It *was* classified... Until somebody on your staff clicked on "Asian Girls Bound and Gagged".
Selina Meyer : Oh, Ben... Or Kent. Or Leon. Oh, God... Or Marjorie.
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Selina Meyer : How long am I supposed to be here?
Ben Cafferty : I could be dead before you ever get outta here.
Selina Meyer : Well, no offense, Ben, but honestly, that could be, like, tonight.
Ben Cafferty : God willing.
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Minna Häkkinen : I forgave you for not voting for me to be the head of the IMF.
Selina Meyer : Minna, you don't go to prison when you're not the head of the IMF.
Minna Häkkinen : Just the prison of unmet potential.
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Kent Davison : These tunnels date back to World War II.
Selina Meyer : Really?
Kent Davison : Local citizens banded together in secret to assist the Nazis.
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Murman Shalikashvili : Once, I told my enemy it was tunnel escape, but in fact, I just buried him alive.
Selina Meyer : Murman...!
[laughs]
Murman Shalikashvili : Actually, it was her, but story is funnier with a man, huh? In these #MeToo days, you know?
Selina Meyer : Actually, I think it could work with a woman. Either way, it's a very good story.
Murman Shalikashvili : But I would never, ever buried alive my dear old friend Selina.
Selina Meyer : Chivalry is not dead, Murman.
Murman Shalikashvili : No, no, no. Her name was Svetlana, and she's definitely dead.
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Selina Meyer : Lookit, Lu, we have always been able to do business together. If I'm elected, the U.S. is gonna import a shit-ton more of your tainted baby formula and defective drywall.
Lu Chi-Jang : A little secret.
Selina Meyer : What?
Lu Chi-Jang : Different label, same product.