- [first lines]
- Rick: Hey, kids! It doesn't matter what you are, punks, skins, rastas, mod rockers, Keith Chegwin even. Everybody everywhere, stop snogging and pay attention to me! 'Cos if you're a wild-eyed loner at the gates of oblivion, then hitch a ride with us, 'cos we're riding on the last freedom moped out of nowhere and we haven't even told our parents what time we're coming home! So put on your dancing trousers and get down to the total and utter king of rock and roll, Cliff Richard!
- Cliff Richard: [when the song finishes] Can I go now?
- [Vyvyan hits him on the head with a mallet and he falls down]