- Andre 'Dre' Johnson: So I hired the best swim coach in town to give me a lesson, and I nailed it.
- Nelson: Dre, I teach profoundly disabled toddlers, and I've never seen anyone more ill-equipped or less likely to improve. You should never be near water. I recommend you drain your pool and drink from small cups. I mean -- I beg you to listen to me. Your children, they need you around.
- Andre 'Dre' Johnson: Well. Seems like a rather odd graduation speech.