Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (TV Series)

Tobacco (2015)

John Oliver: Self - Host

Photos 

Quotes 

• John Oliver : [on tobacco]  Wow. So it's an aging product that's decreasing in popularity and yet somehow, it just can't stop making money. It's basically the agricultural equivalent of U2.

• John Oliver : I'm pretty sure I would find a healthy lung disgusting, but that thing does look like you're trying to breathe through baked ziti.

• John Oliver : Someone should really give those lawyers a pat on the back... and a punch in the face, but a pat on the back first. Pat then punch. Pat-punch. They need a pat-punch. Little pat, big punch.

• John Oliver : I could get angry and I could call tobacco companies "assholes" or "monsters" or "open sores on Satan's dick". But instead, let's rise above it.

• John Oliver : I present to you the new face of Marlboro, Jeff the Diseased Lung in a Cowboy Hat. We are offering Jeff to you, Philip Morris International, to use as you wish. Put him on your billboards. Put him on some ads. In fact, and don't be mad...

  [anticipatory audience laughter] 

  John Oliver : we've already started doing that for you.