- Rachel Zane: I just never thought I'd see the great Harriet Specter making her own copies.
- Donna Paulsen: Is that what this thing does?
- Rachel Zane: You've never made a copy in your life before, have you?
- Donna Paulsen: Course not. I'm too busy being a badass... and worrying about my hair.
- Harvey Specter: I'm working on getting Ava off these charges, and I got Mike working on getting her out on bail.
- Jessica Pearson: So you're back with him.
- Harvey Specter: What's the point of having a right arm without a right hand?
- Louis Litt: Bran bars are forbidden to first years.
- Mike Ross: Since when?
- Louis Litt: Since two seconds ago, order of the quartermaster, who is no longer speaking with you. Rachel. Can you please instruct the associate to your right to pass the nondairy creamer?
- Mike Ross: Louis, as I have been trying to tell you in person, and in the note I left, and in your voice mail, I'm sorry.
- Louis Litt: [ignores him] Do you know what nondairy creamer is, Rachel?
- Rachel Zane: Uh...
- Louis Litt: It's a metaphor. The first sip, you think it's real, you know? After all, it wants you to believe that it's genuine and it's good and it's gonna deliver on its promise, but then, with time, you realize that it's just a concoction of chemicals that's designed to disguise the truth that it's actually full of shit.
- Rachel Zane: Then why are you drinking it?
- Louis Litt: I'm lactose intolerant.
- Harvey Specter: I have to say, I'm flattered.
- Ava Hessington: I don't want you to be flattered. I want you to say yes.
- Harvey Specter: As much success as I've had with that line myself, I'm afraid I'm not an oilman.
- Ava Hessington: The oil business is about oil as much as you being a lawyer is about the law. Every day is a knife fight in a prison yard, and something tells me you like a good knife fight.
- Harvey Specter: No rules in a knife fight.
- Mike Ross: Yeah, baby! Butch and Sundance are back.
- Harvey Specter: Ooh, no go.
- Mike Ross: What do... what do... what do you mean, "no go?"
- Harvey Specter: I mean, you're not Butch or Sundance.
- Mike Ross: Why not?
- Harvey Specter: 'Cause Butch was the leader, and Sundance was the gunslinger, and I'm both.
- Mike Ross: Okay, but Sundance couldn't swim, and Butch never shot anyone, so that makes you a loser.
- Harvey Specter: Better than a fraud.
- Mike Ross: I think it's time for some new material.
- Harvey Specter: You write Midnight Train to Georgia, you don't just sing it once. And speaking of Butch Cassidy, let's go start a knife fight.
- [Jessica hands over a check]
- Harvey Specter: [reads it] That's $1/2 million.
- Jessica Pearson: Mm-hm. First dividend check of the merger.
- Harvey Specter: That was my buy-in amount.
- Jessica Pearson: Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea after all.
- Harvey Specter: Wait a second. What was your check for?
- Jessica Pearson: More than that.
- Harvey Specter: 1.2?
- Jessica Pearson: I'm not telling.
- Harvey Specter: 1.5? You're three times more valuable than me?
- Jessica Pearson: Oh, I don't think that. The check thinks that.
- Jessica Pearson: Harvey, is there something you'd like to tell me about Ava?
- Harvey Specter: Yeah, some clients can be a pain in the ass.
- Jessica Pearson: Some ex-clients too.
- Harvey Specter: Temporary situation.
- Jessica Pearson: Good, good, 'cause I just wanted to make sure you were still all over it.
- Harvey Specter: Did you want to make sure the sun was still shining and the sky was still blue?
- Jessica Pearson: I'd be humble after I got fired... if I ever got fired.
- Judge Pearl Atkins: You bring an accusation like that into my courtroom, you better be able to back it up.
- Harvey Specter: Your Honor, when I told him he took this case to stick it to me, he said, quote, "I did, and now I got her, and you didn't see it coming."
- Cameron Dennis: You know what, Your Honor? He's right. I am sticking it to him. Guilty as charged - just like his client.
- Harvey Specter: Okay, let me...
- Judge Pearl Atkins: That's enough. I am not a washing machine. You two are not here to air your dirty laundry.
- Cameron Dennis: She admitted to bribing a colonel in the army, and that same army killed these people.
- Harvey Specter: Three environmentalists died in the polar ice cap. You think she killed them also?
- Cameron Dennis: Maybe I'll look into that.
- Harvey Specter: You gonna leak it to a corporate raider too?
- Judge Pearl Atkins: [to Cameron] What's he talking about?
- Harvey Specter: I'm talking about the fact that he leaked this whole thing to Tony Gianopolous. This is a personal vendetta, and he has no concrete evidence against my client. Not only do I want no bail, I want you to throw this case out right now.
- Judge Pearl Atkins: Well, I'm not gonna do that, but I'll tell you something, Mr. Dennis. I am setting bail - at $1 - and if you don't have any evidence, I'm gonna hear his motion for summary judgment, rule in his favor, and this trial is gonna be over before it even starts.
- Harvey Specter: Louis, have you given any thought to a rebound associate?
- Louis Litt: Harvey, come on, you know I'm not that kind of guy.
- Harvey Specter: Come on, you have him file a few interrogatories, maybe pick up your dry cleaning, and then you cut him loose.
- Louis Litt: With no strings attached?
- Harvey Specter: Better men than you have done it.
- Louis Litt: No.
- Harvey Specter: Yep.
- Louis Litt: Who, Baird?
- Harvey Specter: A week-long fling I ended six days too late.
- Louis Litt: Yeah, but Harvey, I don't just want a superficial relationship, you know? I want a true mentee, someone I can take to the gun club or mudding or to the origami festival.
- Harvey Specter: Louis, you're gonna find the right one.
- [leaves]
- Harvey Specter: Origami festival? Oh, my God.
- Harvey Specter: This is bullshit, Cameron. We had a deal.
- Cameron Dennis: A deal where your client admitted to bribing a foreign official. That Colonel that she paid off? After that, six people were killed by his troops.
- Harvey Specter: I give my driver a tip, and then he runs over someone. Doesn't mean I had anything to do with it.
- Ava Hessington: Do you think I did this?
- Harvey Specter: That's irrelevant. I just want to make sure I know all the evidence against you.
- Ava Hessington: I have no idea what the evidence is, because I had nothing to do with it, and you say it's irrelevant, but it's not irrelevant to me. Do you think I did this?
- Harvey Specter: Do you want a lawyer who thinks you're innocent and loses or a lawyer who doesn't want to know and wins?
- Ava Hessington: You know the answer to that.
- Harvey Specter: Then don't ask me that question again, 'cause after I win and you're free, what I think won't matter.
- Mike Ross: What Harvey knows is that I'm the "A" team and you're the "B" team, so you can leave the folder or you can take it with you, but if you're looking to ride some partner's coattails, you're gonna have to look somewhere else.
- Katrina Bennett: Well, the "B" team worked at the D.A.'s office and came up with a defense strategy based on a specific knowledge of Cameron Dennis. The "A" team quotes him movies. We'll see who Harvey does and doesn't value.
- Donna Paulsen: [entering] Katrina, Mike is Harvey's guy. When he tells you he's speaking for Harvey, he's speaking for Harvey. And please don't come into this office when I'm away from my desk again.
- Mike Ross: I heard about what you did with, uh... Katrina.
- Harvey Specter: I know I asked you not to, and I wasn't going to, but... I saw her, and I couldn't help it.
- Mike Ross: I get it. She brings that out in people - but, listen, just don't let it happen again.
- Katrina Bennett: You're not the fool anymore, Louis. Mike Ross is. And I can't take it back. I put myself out on a limb for you; so, if you say no to me, I won't just be a fool. I'll be done.