- Michelangelo: Do you like pizza?
- Chris Bradford: Yeah, sure...
- Michelangelo: [hugs Bradford] We have so much in common!
- [last lines]
- Raphael: How ya doing, Mikey?
- Michelangelo: [sighs] This was all my fault, I should have never thought I could be friends with a human.
- Raphael: Don't be so hard on yourself.
- Michelangelo: So it's not my fault?
- Raphael: Of course it's your fault!
- [pause]
- Raphael: If you tell the others, I'll beat the green off you, but... you're an awesome guy.
- Michelangelo: Bradford didn't think so.
- Raphael: Well, he's a psychotic killing machine. You deserve way better friends than that.
- Michelangelo: You know what? You're right. Thanks, Raph!
- Raphael: Anytime.
- [leaves]
- Michelangelo: [at the computer] "Unfriend." Hahaha! Revenge!
- Michelangelo: Whoa, that rad! Oh, I wish me and Chris Bradford were friends!
- [laughing]
- April O'Neil: Mikey, you already have a human friend. Me!
- Michelangelo: April, you don't count. We saved your life, you have to like us.
- Raphael: [sarcastic] Too bad there's no place for freaks to meet people where no can see how hideous they are.
- April O'Neil: Wait, there is... the internet! Donnie, can I see your laptop?
- April O'Neil: Uh, y - uh, sure! Just a sec.
- April O'Neil: Check it out, It's a site where you can make friends with anybody online.
- Michelangelo: Sweet!
- Michelangelo: [gasp] Ohh, Chris Bradford's on here! He'll be my first friend!
- Michelangelo: Mikey, people don't always respond immed -
- [laptop beeps]
- Michelangelo: But sometimes they do.
- Michelangelo: [gasp] No way! Chris Bradford has accepted my friendship! I have a friend! Thanks, April!
- Donatello: Where are you going? hey!
- Michelangelo: To hang out with my friend, Chris Bradford.
- April O'Neil: This guy's famous. He's probably has thousand friends.
- Michelangelo: And guess who's number 5,286?
- April O'Neil: You?
- Michelangelo: Daniel Ramirez and I next to him. Later!
- Michelangelo: Awww! It's a little kitty! And its name is...
- Cat Owner: [calling] Mittens!
- Michelangelo: Good guess... Wait, who said that?
- Cat Owner: Mittens!
- Donatello: I think that's the owner.
- Donatello: What're you doing?
- Raphael: Whoa, Hey.
- Leonardo: Mikey, wait!
- Michelangelo: What? I'm returning Mittens to her owner.
- Raphael: Are you an idiot? Wait, let me rephrase that: You are an idiot!
- Donatello: You can't show show yourself to a human!
- Michelangelo: Why not?
- Donatello: Because they'll freak the heck out, that why not!
- Michelangelo: No they won't, I'm not so scary!
- Raphael: You're an ugly green mutant, armed with ninja weapons!
- Raphael: Face it, humans will never understand you. Heck, we don't even understand you!
- Michelangelo: [sighs] yeah.
- [gasp]
- Michelangelo: But I bet that guy would!
- Leonardo: Chris Bradford. The martial arts superstar with a chain of dojos across the country. He's your soulmate?
- Michelangelo: We've got so much in common.
- [poses like Bradford]
- Donatello: what if you stop standing like that?
- Michelangelo: We'll have a little less in common, but still a lot! And look, he's in town for martial arts expo. Maybe he'll show me his secret kata, the Death Dragon and I'll show him my secret kata, the Secret Kata!
- Donatello: Catchy
- Michelangelo: check it out.
- [shouting]
- Michelangelo: [Whoopz] But don't tell anyone you saw it
- Leonardo: No problem
- Raphael: Face it, Mikey, Chris Bradford is the last person on earth that you would be his friends with you. Well, tried for last, with everyone else on earth.
- Xever Montes: In prison, we had to make our own weapons.
- Chris Bradford: I'll keep that in mind if I ever end up in prison.
- Leonardo: [after Mikey showed them a new move he learned] That was amazing!
- Donatello: Yeah, it's devastatingly affective and complex.
- Raphael: And yet even Mikey could learn it.
- Michelangelo: Thank you.
- [pauses]
- Michelangelo: Hey!