- When Clyde finds himself in the best program at school, Lincoln has to find a way to reconnect before the epic spitball battle they've been preparing for. Dad tries every trick in the book to get an annoying song out of his head.
- Lincoln and Clyde are busy preparing for the upcoming epic spitball battle at school. After making a few adjustments to the spitball-launching machine they have prepared to use in the battle, the Infinite Spitball Super Cyclone 5000, they test it, only to discover that with its current design, the machine has plenty of strengths, including strong propulsion, a good moisture launch ratio, viable speed, excellent adhesion, and one dominant flaw: it has poor accuracy and is prone to malfunctioning in a short amount of time after activation. Lincoln then decides to retrieve a hydro pump from an old jet ski in the landfill so they can use it in their spitball machine; before they can head anywhere, Clyde gets called home to study for an exam that will determine whether or not he is eligible for admission into the B.E.T.R. (Bright, Exceptional, Talented, and Remarkable) program at school, so he leaves but promises to retrieve the hydro pump from the landfill with Lincoln the next day after school. That night, Mr. Loud checks on his youngest daughter, Lily, who has been feeling under the weather lately. Lily, who is still unwell after contracting a recent illness, decides to watch a cartoon called Johnny Rabbit, which Mr. Loud agrees to do. They watch the program repeatedly until Lily falls asleep, but having watched it for three hours incessantly, Mr. Loud ends up with the theme song stuck in his head, so it keeps him awake all night and into the morning. The next day, Lincoln and Clyde sit the exam needed to enter the B.E.T.R. program. When the scores come in, Clyde discovers that he got the second-highest score in the entire school and therefore is beyond qualified to join the B.E.T.R. program, so he accepts the offer to join the program. After Clyde breaks the news to Lincoln, Lincoln becomes proud of his friend for getting admitted into the B.E.T.R. program. He decides to show him some new blueprints for the Cyclone since their old blueprints had fallen out of a folder when they were walking in the hallway earlier; he quickly learns that due to being in the B.E.T.R. program, Clyde has now had his schedule altered and cannot meet him at any convenient time during the school day. Lincoln offers to meet him in the landfill after school, to which Clyde agrees. Unfortunately for Lincoln, Clyde becomes so hooked by everything the B.E.T.R. program has to offer him, such as a virtual field trip to the Pyramids of Giza, he completely forgets about his promise to Lincoln, who becomes so impatient waiting for him that he retreats homeward to his garage and waits for Clyde until he finally arrives. Upon Clyde's arrival, Lincoln confronts him about the breakage of his promise to meet him in the landfill, remarking that he has become entirely obsessed with the B.E.T.R. program, so he decides that if they are ever going to prepare for the spitball battle, Clyde needs to resign from the program as soon as possible because they would otherwise never accomplish anything. Clyde suggests a workaround to the issue by offering Lincoln to retake his test so he can also enter the B.E.T.R. program, which intrigues him enough to give it some effort the next day. Unfortunately for Lincoln, by the time his test score comes in, it turns out that he has bombed the exam, and the school principal has decided to hold him back to fifth grade until he can meet the standard requirements. Later that day, Mr. Loud arrives home from work but discovers that no matter what he does to get the Johnny Rabbit theme song out of his head, such as listening to another song on his car radio, it always remains stuck in his head when he has the radio turned off. Unable to cope with the trauma of having the annoyingly catchy song integrated into his brain, he offers some cash to his daughters as a potential reward for helping relieve the song from his head. Enticed by the possibility of monetary gain, they demonstrate their methods of evicting catchy songs from their heads. Unfortunately for Mr. Loud, their methods all fail for him. Things take a turn for the worse when one of his daughters, Lucy, attempts to expel the song from his head by summoning demons to extract it, which causes him to get an even darker and greatly distorted variant of the song stuck in his head. The next day, Lincoln spots Clyde (among other members of the B.E.T.R. program) walking down the hallway in a group, and upon seeing his best friend, he tries to convince Clyde to formulate a battle plan for the spitball battle that Friday, but Clyde's new friend, Wainwright, discourages him from listening to Lincoln, which is enough to send Lincoln into an emotional spiral. Lincoln tries to talk to one of his former teachers, Mr. Bolhofner, to assess the situation but uncovers no help from it and decides that he should lie down and think about it. In doing so, he falls asleep and has a nightmare where he has become the janitor of an office building run by Clyde, who has become the chief executive officer of a company. To Lincoln's ultimate despair, the nightmare's version of Clyde completely forgets about him and everything they used to do when they were best friends, and he goes to great lengths to fire Lincoln on the spot. The thought of getting kicked to the curb by his best friend effectively snaps Lincoln out of his nightmare and urges him to rush to the room where the B.E.T.R. program's members are currently meeting and convince Clyde to resign at once so they can prepare for the spitball battle. To Lincoln's surprise, Clyde does not budge, and he soon finds out that his friend, Wainwright, has convinced him not to engage in anything quite as "fatuous" as a spitball battle. Lincoln attempts to deny Wainwright's statement by declaring that a spitball battle is the polar opposite of "fatuous," only to discover that "fatuous" means "silly and pointless," which Clyde agrees is an accurate description of the spitball battle. Now realizing his defeat at the hands of Clyde's interests getting the best of him, Lincoln brashly abandons Clyde and decides to participate in the spitball battle with or without his friend, no matter what it may come down to. On the day of the spitball battle, Lincoln enters the field solo but finds no opportunity to use the Cyclone to his advantage because it's intended to fight the battle in an "every man for himself" fashion. As a result, he ends up getting his butt kicked on the battlefield, which Clyde notices during a B.E.T.R. program meeting. Fearing for his friend's safety within the immense dangers of being hopeless with no reliable advantages on the battlefield, Clyde abandons the meeting to join Lincoln in the spitball battle. With Clyde present on the battlefield, Lincoln regains his confidence, and they both use the Cyclone to their advantage. The spitball-launching machine proves highly effective, allowing the dynamic duo to eliminate almost everybody on the battlefield. Eventually, the only fighters still left on the battlefield are Lincoln, Clyde, and two of their friends, Liam and Rusty. Fortunately for Lincoln and Clyde, the mere power of the Cyclone is enough to intimidate Liam and Rusty to the point where they flee from battle before they can even face exposure to the Cyclone. The Cyclone's intimidation factor causes Lincoln and Clyde to secure their victory, but regardless, they both get sent to the principal's office. During the boys' office visit, Dr. Harlow, the head of the B.E.T.R. program, presents the Cyclone to them and asks which of them is responsible for its creation. They confess to having formulated the idea together, but to their surprise, Dr. Harlow and the school principal are amazed by their efforts. Dr. Harlow compares the spitball-launching machine to the works of Leonardo da Vinci, declaring it to be a marvel of modern engineering, and uses it as a motive to begin a brand-new program called the B.E.S.T. (Brilliant Engineers, Scientists, and Technicians) program with Lincoln and Clyde as the spearheads. While the boys appreciate the offer, they decline it because they designed the Cyclone not to be recognized or to be displayed on a pedestal but to fling spitballs in all directions, and the only thing even remotely close to the B.E.S.T. program the two of them want to be part of is their friendship, so they leave the principal's office to get on with the day. That night, as Mr. Loud tries everything to fall asleep with the dark and distorted Johnny Rabbit theme song still stuck in his head, the song becomes so distorted it completely vanishes and allows him to enjoy some personal peace without being forced to hear the song again for once.
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