- Ziggy: [narrating] In 1995, theorizing that one can time travel within their own lifetime, Doctor Sam Beckett stepped into the Quantum Leap accelerator and vanished. After years of attempting to bring him home, the project was abandoned... Until now...
- Addison Augustine: That is a terrifying amount of C-4.
- Dr. Ben Song: Is there an unterrifying amount?
- Herbert 'Magic' Williams: Jenn, I just met a guy named Chris at the bar, says he's your date. Why does he think I'm a video game designer?
- Jenn Chou: Would you prefer I told him you run a top-secret time travel project?
- Addison Augustine: Have you been hiding?
- Dr. Ben Song: Hiding? No. I was just in a different section of the apartment.
- Addison Augustine: You mean the bathroom, where you were hiding from the party you didn't want to have?
- Dr. Ben Song: I love parties. Having everyone in here, touching all our stuff-- I would have proposed way sooner if I knew we got to do this.
- Addison Augustine: Who are you right now?
- Dr. Ben Song: What, I don't normally punch out bad guys while wearing a tux?
- Addison Augustine: No. Normally you're a "punching out code in a T-shirt" kind of guy.
- Dr. Ben Song: That really hurt my hand.
- Addison Augustine: Ben, please don't kill anyone.
- Dr. Ben Song: That pretzel cart came out of nowhere!
- Ian Wright: One of my best friends has intentionally gotten himself stuck in quantum space-time and we can't get him back. It's like a bad mushroom trip that I just can't sober up from. Not that... Not that I do mushrooms. I would never... as an employee of the United States military, I would never.
- Addison Augustine: Ian? Maybe next time, you can just write an algorithm that creates the perfect playlist.
- Ian Wright: Who has the time? By the way, did I tell you about the quantum simulation that I ran this morning?
- Dr. Ben Song: Ian, we all agreed, no work talk for one night.
- Ian Wright: I didn't agree to that.