"Doctor Who" Closing Time (TV Episode 2011) Poster

(TV Series)

(2011)

Matt Smith: The Doctor

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James Corden and Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005) James Corden and Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005) Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005) Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005) James Corden and Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005) Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005) Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005) Lynda Baron and Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005) James Corden and Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005) James Corden and Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005) James Corden and Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005) James Corden and Matt Smith in Doctor Who (2005)

Quotes 

  • The Doctor : Yes, he likes that, Alfie. Though personally he prefers to be called Stormaggedon, Dark Lord of All.

    Craig Owens : Sorry, what?

    The Doctor : [indicating the baby]  That's what he calls himself.

    Craig Owens : How d'you know that?

    The Doctor : I speak baby.

    Craig Owens : Of course you do.

  • The Doctor : Stop crying - you've got a lot to look forward to, you know! A normal human life on Earth - mortgage repayments, the 9-to-5, a nagging sense of spiritual emptiness... Save the crying for later, boyo.

  • The Doctor : [talking with baby Alfie]  No, he's your dad.

    The Doctor : You can't just call him 'Not Mum'.

    Craig Owens : Not Mum?

    The Doctor : That's you. Also 'Not Mum', that's me.

    The Doctor : [leaning to hear Alfie]  And everybody is...?

    The Doctor : "Peasants".

    The Doctor : That's a bit unfortunate.

  • Craig Owens : A teleport? A tele... a teleport... like a beam-me-up teleport, like you see in Star Trek?

    The Doctor : Exactly! Someone's been using a beam-me-up Star Trek teleport. Could be disguised as anything.

    Craig Owens : A teleport in a shop? That's ridiculous!

    [lights flicker in the lift as they teleport out of the shop] 

    Craig Owens : What was that? Was that the lights again?

    The Doctor : [in a high voice]  Yes, that's it, that's all, it's the lights.

    Craig Owens : Why'd you say that like that?

    The Doctor : Like what? Like, like, like, like what?

    [dropping voice] 

    Craig Owens : Like that, in that high-pitched voice.

    The Doctor : Just keep looking at me, Craig. Right at me. Just keep looking.

    Craig Owens : Why?

    The Doctor : Well, because, because...

    Craig Owens : [starts to look behind him] 

    The Doctor : [grabs Craig]  ... because I love you.

    Craig Owens : You love me?

    The Doctor : Yes, Craig, it's you, it's always been you.

    Craig Owens : Me?

    The Doctor : [takes out sonic screwdriver and puts arms around Craig]  Is that so surprising?

    Craig Owens : Doctor, are you gonna kiss me?

    The Doctor : Yes, Craig, yes I am. Would you like that? Bit out of practice, but I've had some wonderful feedback.

    [puckers lips while fidding with his sonic screwdriver] 

    Craig Owens : Doctor, no, I can't, I'm taken...

    [pulls back, looks behind him, and sees an approaching Cyberman] 

    Craig Owens : Oh my God, what's that!

    The Doctor : Or we could just hold hands if it would make you feel more comfortable!

    Craig Owens : What is happening?

    The Doctor : Well first of all, I don't really love you, except as a friend.

    Craig Owens : What is that?

    The Doctor : Ahhh!

    [sonics the teleporter so they arrive back in the lift] 

    The Doctor : Quick reverse!

    Craig Owens : Okay, what the hell just happened!

  • Craig Owens : You've noticed something. You've got your noticing face on. I have nightmares about that face.

    The Doctor : Nope! Given all that up. Done noticing things.

    [the lights flicker] 

    The Doctor : Didn't even notice that, for example.

  • The Doctor : It's not his fault he doesn't have mammary glands! No, neither do I.

  • The Doctor : Oh, you've redecorated! I don't like it.

    Craig Owens : It's a different house. We moved.

    The Doctor : Yes, that's it.

  • The Doctor : Robot dog - not as much fun as I remember.

  • The Doctor : [playing with a remote controlled toy helicopter]  It goes up, tiddly up! It goes down, tiddly down! For only £49.99, which I think personally is a bit steep. But then again, it's your parents' cash, and they'll only waste it on boring stuff like lamps and vegetables. YAWN!

  • The Doctor : [Said while trying to deactivate the cybermat]  Don't worry, I have an app for that!

  • The Doctor : [sonics the lift open]  Goodbye. And here's the lift!

    Craig Owens : It says it's out of order.

    The Doctor : Not anymore. See? Here to help.

    The Doctor : [pushes Craig inside] 

    Craig Owens : It says "DANGER"!

    The Doctor : Oh rubbish! Lifts aren't dangerous!

  • The Doctor : [to a reprogrammed cybermat probe]  Come along, Bitey!

  • The Doctor : Alfie, why is there a sinister beeping coming from behind me?

  • Craig Owens : [seeing the Doctor in a shop]  What the hell are you doing here?

    The Doctor : Oh, I'm the Doctor. I work in a shop now. Here to help.

    The Doctor : [pointing at his name badge]  Look, they gave me a badge with my name on in case I forget who I am. Very thoughtful, as that does happen.

  • Craig Owens : The Cybermen - they blew up! I blew them up with love!

    The Doctor : No, that's impossible. And also grossly sentimental and over-simplistic. You destroyed them because of the deeply-ingrained hereditary human trait to protect one's own genes. Which in turn triggered a... a... Um. Yeah. Love. You blew them up with love.

  • The Doctor : It must be shielded from meta-static energy, of course!

    Craig Owens : Oh. Of course.

    The Doctor : Don't worry, I have an app for that!

  • The Doctor : Hey. I'm the Doctor. I was here to help. And you are very, very welcome.

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs


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