Peep Show (TV Series)

New Year's Eve (2010)

Paterson Joseph: Alan Johnson

Quotes 

• Johnson : What have you come as? Techno hippie street bum?

  Jeremy Usborne : I'm not actually wearing a costume, Alan, so the joke's on you.

  Johnson : Yes, I knew that, so the joke's on you.

  Jeremy Usborne : Well, I didn't realise you knew that, so it can't have been a very good joke.

• [Johnson, a former alcoholic, picks up a glass of champagne] 

  Mark Corrigan : [grabbing hold of the glass in Johnson's hand]  Isn't it like kryptonite? Won't it kill you?

  Johnson : I'm not going to drink it, Mark, I'll just take a sniff for old time's sake.

  [Mark lets go. Johnson sniffs it, then downs it] 

  Johnson : More fool you, asshole.