- Damon Salvatore: I kissed you. Thought you kissed me back. Doppelgänger high jinx ensued. How do you think I'm doing?
- Elena Gilbert: I think that you're hurt.
- Damon Salvatore: Mmm... no, I don't get hurt, Elena.
- Elena Gilbert: No, you don't admit that you get hurt. You get angry, and cover it up, and then you do something stupid.
- Damon Salvatore: You're scared. You think Katherine's gonna send me off the deep end, don't you? I don't need her for that. You know what? Why is it such a surprise that I would kiss you?
- Elena Gilbert: That's not a surprise. I'm surprised that you thought I would kiss you back.
- Damon Salvatore: Now I'm hurt.
- Damon Salvatore: [about his kiss with Katherine, thinking she was Elena] Hey, if you wanna forget it happened, fine... but I can't!
- Stefan Salvatore: What happened tonight when you thought she was Elena?
- Damon Salvatore: It's risking another frown line encroaching on a very crowded forehead. We... kissed.
- Elena Gilbert: And you thought it was me?
- Stefan Salvatore: What do you mean you kissed?
- Damon Salvatore: Well... you know, when two lips pucker and they go
- [makes kissing noises]
- Damon Salvatore: .
- Damon Salvatore: I've got a better idea.
- Elena Gilbert: What's that?
- Damon Salvatore: [about Katherine] I'm just gonna ignore the bitch.
- Elena Gilbert: How did you leave it in there with John?
- Stefan Salvatore: I... er... asked him to leave town.
- Elena Gilbert: Asked? You threatened him?
- Stefan Salvatore: Yes. I threatened him.
- Damon Salvatore: If I do this, you and me, call it a truce?
- Bonnie Bennett: No. But you'll do it anyway.
- [Smiles]
- Bonnie Bennett: For Elena.
- Damon Salvatore: [about Katherine] Well, she certainly knows how to make an entrance.
- Stefan Salvatore: She-She fooled one of us. What does that mean?
- Damon Salvatore: She pretended to be Elena too when I showed up earlier tonight.
- Elena Gilbert: [walks in] I told Jeremy. I can't lie to him anymore.
- Stefan Salvatore: [walks over to Elena] You alright?
- Elena Gilbert: No, I'm not alright. I thought with all the tomb vampires gone, things would get better.
- Stefan Salvatore: I know. We all did.
- Elena Gilbert: Katherine was in this house. That means she was invited in. What are we gonna do?
- Damon Salvatore: Move.
- Elena Gilbert: Very helpful. Thank you.
- Elena Gilbert: Hey. How you doing?
- Damon Salvatore: [Sarcastically] Great Elena. Walking on sunshine, thanks for asking.
- Elena Gilbert: Damon.
- Damon Salvatore: Elena.
- Elena Gilbert: We should be able to talk about this. Damon, we're close enough now. I really want to know how you are doing.
- Damon Salvatore: I kissed you.Though you kissed me back. Doppelganger high jinx ensued. How do you think I'm doing?
- Elena Gilbert: Thanks... for... uh... looking out for us. For me.
- Damon Salvatore: That's me. Your trusty bodyguard, calm in a crisis.
- Stefan Salvatore: What game are you playing?
- Katherine Pierce: Fine, you want to play with me?
- Stefan Salvatore: I don't know. How can I play if I don't know the rules?
- Katherine Pierce: No rules, Stefan. Don't you remember? No rules.
- [walks away]
- Elena Gilbert: [Walks from the bathroom and sees Damon sitting on her bed] Oh God! You scared me.
- Damon Salvatore: Just doing my part in neighbourhood watch.
- Damon Salvatore: Speaking of your guilt, how's Caroline?
- Bonnie Bennett: She's much better.
- Damon Salvatore: You're welcome.
- Bonnie Bennett: No, you're welcome.
- Damon Salvatore: Why am I welcome?
- Bonnie Bennett: You live to see another day.
- Damon Salvatore: No good deed goes unpunished with you, does it?
- [last lines]
- Caroline Forbes: Elena?
- Katherine Pierce: [Pretending to be Elena] Hi Caroline.
- Caroline Forbes: What are you doing here?
- Katherine Pierce: My name is Katherine. I was hoping you could give the Salvatore brothers a message for me.
- Caroline Forbes: What are you talking about? What message?
- Katherine Pierce: Game on.
- [Katherine places a pillow over Caroline's face until she stops moving]
- Stefan Salvatore: [Elena leaves John and Stefan alone in John's hospital room] You may be okay with dying, but I have a better plan for you.
- [bites his wrist and places it on John's mouth]
- Stefan Salvatore: You now have my blood in your system, all I have to do is kill you. Now take my advice, leave town. Elena doesn't want you here. It's about twenty-four hours before the blood leaves your system, that's enough time to disappear, or so help me God, I will turn you into a vampire, and I will watch you hate yourself more than you already do.
- [lets go of John and walks to the door]
- Stefan Salvatore: The clock starts now!
- Damon Salvatore: [after kissing Katherine] Wait... brief pause. I have a question... answer it and it's back to fireworks and rocket's red glare,
- [grins, shakes his head]
- Damon Salvatore: answer it right... I'll forget the last one hundred and forty five years I've spent missing you. I'll forget... how much I loved you, I'll forget everything and we could start over. This can be our defining moment, see we have the time... it's the beauty of eternity. I just need the truth, just once...
- Katherine Pierce: Stop. I already know the question... and the answer...
- Elena Gilbert: [about Jeremy after taking the pills and drinking Anna's blood] ... he looks fine, but then again, so do you...
- Bonnie Bennett: [asking about the Mayor being effected by the device] Do you want to know why?
- Damon Salvatore: Yes, Bonnie, I would love to know why a non-vampire was tortured by the vampire torture device that you let John Gilbert use against us.
- Stefan Salvatore: Don't flirt with me Katherine. I'm not Damon. I haven't spent a hundred and forty five years obsessed with you.
- Katherine Pierce: Yeah... based on your choice in women, I'd say otherwise.
- Damon Salvatore: You think Katherine's gonna send me off the deep end, don't ya? I don't need her for that.
- Jeremy Gilbert: Look, I'm sorry about your dad.
- Tyler Lockwood: Today's been a big day of sorry's from people who really don't give a crap.
- Jeremy Gilbert: I remember when my dad died, I had a houseful of strangers telling me what a great guy he was. Anyway I know how hard all this is.
- Tyler Lockwood: Difference is in your case it was true. My dad was a dick.
- Stefan Salvatore: Yeah... then what?
- Damon Salvatore: Stake her, rip her head off... something poetic.
- Tyler Lockwood: [Seeing his uncle for the first time in years] So, the black sheep returns.
- Mason Lockwood: Tyler?
- Tyler Lockwood: Yeah.
- Mason Lockwood: What happened to you? In my mind you're twelve years old.
- Tyler Lockwood: Well, that's two years older than the last time you saw me, Uncle Mason.
- Elena Gilbert: [Seeing Stefan hurt on the floor because of Katherine] Stefan. W-What happened?
- Damon Salvatore: Katherine happened.
- Katherine Pierce: [Speaking to Bonnie after Bonnie sees who she really is] We haven't officially met. I'm Katherine.
- Damon Salvatore: [visitor waiting for him on couch] Very brave of you to come here.
- Katherine Pierce: I wanted to say goodbye.
- Damon Salvatore: Leaving so soon?
- Katherine Pierce: I know where I'm not wanted.
- Damon Salvatore: Don't pout. It's not attractive in a woman your age.
- [takes sip of his drink]
- Katherine Pierce: [scoffs] Ouch.
- Bonnie Bennett: [at hospital] How is Caroline today?
- Matt Donovan: See for yourself.
- Caroline Forbes: [smiles, glad to see them, miraculous recovery] Jersey Shore is on.
- [her old self, and Bonnie hugs her]
- Caroline Forbes: Oh, careful, still a little sore.
- Bonnie Bennett: Sorry.
- Caroline Forbes: [chuckles] It's okay. But they say I'm healing very quick.
- Matt Donovan: My turn.
- [they kiss]
- Caroline Forbes: [chuckles] Isn't he cute?
- [Bonnie cries happy tears]
- Caroline Forbes: Why are you crying?