- Vance Duke: [referring to the natives] Haha, look at that. The General's got 'em on their knees. Maybe they'll think now that we're gods or such like.
- Coy Duke: I hope so, 'cause I ain't much on being fed to volcanoes.
- Daisy Duke: Me neither.
- Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane: Oh my gritchen gravy, would you look yonder!
- Boss Hogg: It's one of them headen idols... with rubies for eyes and a diamond bigger than a Rudebaker. Why, that diamond alone is worth a dozen Hazzard counties.
- Vance Duke: Hey, I got me an idea. Remember that mineral spring back yonder?
- [Daisy and Coy nod]
- Vance Duke: Why don't we make ourselves some good old Hazzard county blastin' powder?
- Boss Hogg: Lordie, Lordie, Lordie. If you can drive like that, Rosco, how come you can't ever catch them Dukes?
- Uncle Jesse Duke: You know, you can't stir up a mess of trouble for other folks, without spillin' some on yourself.