Photos
Quotes
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Jeff Winger : I discovered at a very early age that if I talk long enough, I can make anything right or wrong. So either I'm God or truth is relative. In either case, booyah!
Duncan : Interesting, it's just that the average person has a much harder time saying 'booyah' to moral relativism.
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Jeff Winger : I'm in a bit of a jam. The Bar Association just suspended my license. Turns out my law degree was not legitimate.
Duncan : I thought you had a Bachelor's from Columbia.
Jeff Winger : Now I have to get one from America. And it can't be an e-mail attachment.
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Duncan : I'm a Professor. You can't talk to me that way!
Jeff Winger : A 6 year old girl could talk to you that way!
Duncan : Yes, because that would be adorable.
Jeff Winger : No, because you're a 5 year old girl and theres a pecking order!
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Duncan : Have you ever heard of the saying "Cheaters never prosper"?
Jeff Winger : Duncan, if I wanted to learn something, I wouldn't have gone to community college.
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Duncan : [text message] Con-4-s-8-tion on football field now! -Duncan
Britta Perry : What's that?
Abed : Does it say you have to pee?
Jeff Winger : No. It's just someone with a misguided grasp of abbreviation.
