Certainly wasn't expecting a lesson in my own self by by watching his story. He's made some monumental mistakes and you can easily say he doesn't deserve this platform, however, there's an amount of sympathy that I can lend to his situation having gone through similar in my own journey (not to that extent!) This is a show that I can imagine helping people in their own path especially people torn with religion and being who they were born to be.
47 Reviews
Pleasantly surprised
halloflipo4 March 2022
Warning: Spoilers
As a European I didn't know Colton Underwood. After reading his history I wanted to skip this coming-out story. It immediately gave me a bad vibe of someone exploiting his coming-out, a narcissist reality star, desperate for attention. But it doesn't feel like that at all.
Most coming-out stories are about the problems people face after their coming out, rejection by parents and not being accepted.
Here we get to learn about the internal struggle of someone who does not want to be gay and has spend most of his life desperately trying not to be unmasked as a homosexual, From playing football and dating girls in high school, to becoming an NFL player and even participating in the bachelor. Until the point he is even hoping that the bachelor will make him hetero: the bachelor as conversion therapy.
He is very honest about the fact that he really hit bottom before he started to realise that coming-out was a nessecity rather than an option.
I found it also very revealing that he acknowledged where his selfhate and homophobia were originated, locker-rooms and church mostly, and that he has been part of the problem. He decides to confront his highschool coach about the homophobic atmosphere in the team and school, but his insecurity is still so big that we literally see him enter as a famous football player but then shrimp to the schoolboy he once was. The telephone conversation with the pastor of his church is even worse, and really breaks him. A lot of comments say that this reality show is scripted and everything is fake, but if these moments were acted, he deserves an Oscar for it. These people really crushed him, and if he hadn't had this support team from Gus and his parents, he would have gone straight back to the closet.
He may be a white privileged rich boy, but his story can be helpful for a lot of gay kids that don't really relate to the stories told in other documentaries or gay movies.
Most coming-out stories are about the problems people face after their coming out, rejection by parents and not being accepted.
Here we get to learn about the internal struggle of someone who does not want to be gay and has spend most of his life desperately trying not to be unmasked as a homosexual, From playing football and dating girls in high school, to becoming an NFL player and even participating in the bachelor. Until the point he is even hoping that the bachelor will make him hetero: the bachelor as conversion therapy.
He is very honest about the fact that he really hit bottom before he started to realise that coming-out was a nessecity rather than an option.
I found it also very revealing that he acknowledged where his selfhate and homophobia were originated, locker-rooms and church mostly, and that he has been part of the problem. He decides to confront his highschool coach about the homophobic atmosphere in the team and school, but his insecurity is still so big that we literally see him enter as a famous football player but then shrimp to the schoolboy he once was. The telephone conversation with the pastor of his church is even worse, and really breaks him. A lot of comments say that this reality show is scripted and everything is fake, but if these moments were acted, he deserves an Oscar for it. These people really crushed him, and if he hadn't had this support team from Gus and his parents, he would have gone straight back to the closet.
He may be a white privileged rich boy, but his story can be helpful for a lot of gay kids that don't really relate to the stories told in other documentaries or gay movies.
Has substance.
Oh_Capital4 December 2021
Normally reality shows are anything but. This series definitely has some real moments, especially between Colton and his Christian friends, along with his pastor in the following scene. The guy still seems unsure of himself and it's weird that he is putting these intimate moments on display. But it is interesting nonetheless.
take it easy
diandraprieto6 December 2021
Yes, hes a cis white priveleged male, yes I initially felt like it was a PR grab when I first heard it was going to be produced and released, but really, I enjoyed watching this doc and learning about the lifelong struggle Colton dealt with. While he did monetize his journey, i think he genuinely wanted to shed light on the homophobia in American sports and his Chrisitian upbringing and truly wanted to have a positive impact sharing his story. The past hurts upon Cassie cannot be undone, and legally, from what I understand, cannot be fully discussed. I think it took a lot of courage regardless and I think this doc has its place.
Good message but wish Colton was less of a controversial figure
kigaiyuuto4 December 2021
I actually planned on watching Cobalt Blue but it mysteriously postponed at the last minute lol. So I watched this instead to make it a gay Saturday Netflix binge.
Good message/lessons to take from this although it felt produced with every episode clearly themed. It's a shame that a show like this is only possible in the last few years with I am Jazz and I Am Cait just to name a few. Judging by the all reactions of the people around him on this show, we still have a looooong way to go. As a gold-star gay I am thankful for all the LGBTQ people who have paved the way to make today possible.
I wish Colton all the best for the future and please ignore the haters and the judgmental people from inside or outside of the LGBTQ community. People will nitpick on anything to hate on these days, just grow as a better person and be happy.
Good message/lessons to take from this although it felt produced with every episode clearly themed. It's a shame that a show like this is only possible in the last few years with I am Jazz and I Am Cait just to name a few. Judging by the all reactions of the people around him on this show, we still have a looooong way to go. As a gold-star gay I am thankful for all the LGBTQ people who have paved the way to make today possible.
I wish Colton all the best for the future and please ignore the haters and the judgmental people from inside or outside of the LGBTQ community. People will nitpick on anything to hate on these days, just grow as a better person and be happy.
Important
dpoland-765893 December 2021
This doc series is important. For a lot of people. Glad you did this Colton; you'll be helping so many. Putting your mistakes out there and letting others follow along when you're coming out (one of the hardest things to do) is brave. Thanks.
Bravery and truth, and fun!
MTNmovieMan4 December 2021
Simply the best coming out show I've seen. And truth is stranger than fiction, and more entertaining.
Throughly enjoyed this learning experience and I'm very proud to live in the same state as Colton. This took a lot of courage and it couldn't have come from a nicer guy.
Throughly enjoyed this learning experience and I'm very proud to live in the same state as Colton. This took a lot of courage and it couldn't have come from a nicer guy.
Big thank you
baunacholi-861597 December 2021
Warning: Spoilers
Even in 2021, Coming out can be the hardest thing someone might experience in life. Not everybody is that strong, can deal with and process (especially as a child / young adult) all the intimidating and horrific things people probably do and say... Regardless of gender, color, race, family, status or religion it might break u - or not, like in this documentary about Mr. Colton Underwood. I thought it was one of the most touching, human and genuine biographies I saw in a VERY long time. Opening up about the constant struggles of self hate, self loathing, not fitting in and still function on a high level was remarkable... I wish him the best finding himself and ultimately love, husband, family and the fulfilled life he was so naturally talking about.
It's reality TV - manufactured "reality".
Avidviewer-0284715 December 2021
I'm not a fan of "reality TV" which is just scripted TV that tries to look natural. It's manufactured drama, after the fact people are asked to recreate the original moments and that recreation looks fake.
Colton Underwood has had different facets to his life and is embarking on the next chapter, which probably includes more media. He's very handsome and will probably end up in Hollywood on TV or in films. Actually I would have rather watched a documentary about him, I think that would have been much more real.
I wish him well on whatever he pursues.
Colton Underwood has had different facets to his life and is embarking on the next chapter, which probably includes more media. He's very handsome and will probably end up in Hollywood on TV or in films. Actually I would have rather watched a documentary about him, I think that would have been much more real.
I wish him well on whatever he pursues.
Unexpected
ashtonic-341517 December 2021
I am not a big tv watcher so I had no clue who Colton was prior to hearing about him coming out. I thought this was really good and incredibly genuine for a reality show. I heard lots of bad things and was pleasantly surprised. There are many good messages.
strange mix of scripted and naïve
hara19212 December 2021
Was surprised to find out how oppressed society still was for Colton. I thought this was back in my days in rural europe, not in the 2000s in the US. Goes to show however how bad sports and religion are for people who are different.
Could not finish the series as it was too painful to watch him drag this out for cash on tv rather than settling in first.
Worst moment: coming out to his mom (supposedly in front of a camera with no warning) and his mom saying the right things but never giving him a hug! They awkwardly shook hands, the move initiated by him! No hug? From a mom who says I love you anyway? Outch!
Sports and religion are generally STILL NOT safe spaces for queer people. Neither is coming out on a tv show. The latter was his choice. Since being a tv personality is a fulltime job nowadays, i guess he'll be able to cope.
Could not finish the series as it was too painful to watch him drag this out for cash on tv rather than settling in first.
Worst moment: coming out to his mom (supposedly in front of a camera with no warning) and his mom saying the right things but never giving him a hug! They awkwardly shook hands, the move initiated by him! No hug? From a mom who says I love you anyway? Outch!
Sports and religion are generally STILL NOT safe spaces for queer people. Neither is coming out on a tv show. The latter was his choice. Since being a tv personality is a fulltime job nowadays, i guess he'll be able to cope.
Revelant in this day and age
JeanFlores-Dickens11 December 2021
I must admit this caught my surprise, I have never seen an episode of the Bachelor in my life but knew that Colton had just got his gay membership since the gay media covered it a lot.
So here I was, not expecting much but then it hit me, being gay and Christian don't digest well for some people but we are real and we are real to stay.
Colton's dad was a sweetheart and so understanding of the whole thing...it's truly heartwarming.
Can't stand Guz to this day and he adds nothing to the whole show.
I did not only sincerely enjoyed this show but highly recommend it to anyone.
So here I was, not expecting much but then it hit me, being gay and Christian don't digest well for some people but we are real and we are real to stay.
Colton's dad was a sweetheart and so understanding of the whole thing...it's truly heartwarming.
Can't stand Guz to this day and he adds nothing to the whole show.
I did not only sincerely enjoyed this show but highly recommend it to anyone.
Story needed to be told
kimbykell4 December 2021
Colton is far from a role model but his story needed to be told. He's been through hell and back and made some terrible choices, but at the end of the day, he's a human being and deserves our empathy for everything he's suffered growing up as a gay man in a religious community.
I like that he took accountability for his actions and explains what led him to do the things he did. This show has made me see him in a whole new light.
I like that he took accountability for his actions and explains what led him to do the things he did. This show has made me see him in a whole new light.
YES!
martaviahicks3 December 2021
I loved every bit of this. Often times you hear people speak on gays and bashing for no reason. It's so easy to speak on situations you've never been in. It's a challenge to walk in your truth. This was amazing from start to finish. Thank you Colton.
Why again?
ivannano15 December 2021
Everyone's coming out is their own personal journey. And as such is important to them.
That doesn't mean everyone's story deserves a multi-part series on Netflix.
How about the 16yr old neighbour who showed up at my door when his parents kicked him out for being gay? By 28 he had put himself through university, had a large circle of friends, is an associate manager of a clothing manufacturer, spearheaded a LGBTQ youth charity, and is engaged to a loving partner
That's a story to inspire.
A pretty, pseudo-celebrity, white boy of privilege, who faced minimal challenges? Not so much.
That doesn't mean everyone's story deserves a multi-part series on Netflix.
How about the 16yr old neighbour who showed up at my door when his parents kicked him out for being gay? By 28 he had put himself through university, had a large circle of friends, is an associate manager of a clothing manufacturer, spearheaded a LGBTQ youth charity, and is engaged to a loving partner
That's a story to inspire.
A pretty, pseudo-celebrity, white boy of privilege, who faced minimal challenges? Not so much.
Vanity at its best
Gonnabe201512 December 2021
Rich boy wants to be famous. Acts straight to become famous through a reality show. Fails to become famous. Decides to come out. Should be the end of the story but no. That boy is vain and only wants to be famous. Sad that Netflix gives space to such people.
A Resource For Sportsmen And Management
georgegrimes9 October 2022
So much of this documentary series resonated with me. The theme and events are intensely intimate and I found it slightly unsettling that cameras were present in what should be private moments. However, a lot is revealed in what appears on screen to be genuine words, initial responses and body language to benefit anyone wishing to 'come out' especially for sports persons at all levels in their field in our backward society (remember Sparta?). I have read the negative comments for this series, but I feel the six episodes will be a positive resource for so many. Highlights for me was Colton's brother, Conner. He had everything sussed and without fanfare. So interesting that Colton's mother is heard to say that Colton's father is a gay magnet. Colton's father asking his son the overriding question on why did he film The Bachelorette? I can understand the desire to maintain a straight appearance and what better way than The Bachelorette? And we should consider Colton himself, as he stands out as gorgeous in his environment (not to be misunderstood as effeminate) and aren't such people more likely to be gay? I ask myself, why ever didn't they not suspect? Most disappointing for me was the first coming-out party. The reality of the gay community is that most gays do not frequent the gay scene. The coming out party was an alien environment and, I suggest completely irrelevant for a former professional sportsman and man of faith to be subjected to. Colton was clearly uncomfortable. It was telling that Colton's body language at the church with gay Christians was jubilant, with a sense of relief and fitting in. I am heartened to read that following the broadcast Colton has found a long term partner and that they are engaged to be married. They do appear well suited and I wish them every success in the years ahead. This series is significant. It will help many.
Awkward and fake coming out of a very attractive man
iulianturicianu12 December 2021
I'm not American and I didn't know anything about this obvious gorgeous man, but as a gay man myself decided to give it a try. It's so cringy, I'm so sick of the capitalizing on "struggling and coming to terms with own identify/sexuality" when it's so clearly overly produced and it only works if the person is famous (Caitlyn Jenner) or in this case very traditionally attractive.
If you're looking to get into genuinely coming out stories and get inspired by how brave those people are being themselves in a world much more conservative than this series depicts, better watch 'We're here' on HBO.
If you're looking to get into genuinely coming out stories and get inspired by how brave those people are being themselves in a world much more conservative than this series depicts, better watch 'We're here' on HBO.
Helpful
alexisvonp4 December 2021
This show truly stands out because Colton is not your average white gay. He's Christian and an athlete, and for years tried to pray the gay away and hated who he was. That led him to do things he deeply regrets, but eventually he learned to accept himself. This show will be helpful for people in similar situations to start embracing their true selves and living their truth.
An Important Series About a Famous Athlete Coming Out
gregorybmowery5 December 2021
I only know about Colton Underwood as a handsome pro-athlete who was on The Batchelor. Now this five-part series is about his often painful and protracted time coming out as a gay man. That's a good thing because the often homophobic world of professional sports needs to come to terms with it's closeted gay members, and stop the mindless name-calling, and locker room talk that made and continue to make other gay athletes cringe. There is a level of self-involvement that makes me want to say, "Oh come on, Colton. It's not all about you." When he goes to his school to tell his beloved football coach that the kind of locker room jargon that he allowed to happen made him, made him sad. But he left it there. He should have said, there are young men coming out that he will have to coach, and he hoped that from their conversation, he would be sensitive enough to discourage this ind of behavior. It might have been less awkward for the coach to hear and respond to. Colton is often uncomfortable.
A piece of education
teoiosifidis6 December 2021
Very little pieces of series has been more educational that this one. Colton's naked truth helps us realizing how much does it take to.. be yourself as a gay man even now at 2020's. His long and painful path, that unfortunately every LGBTQ+ person has to go through, leads to the light. Just watch this if you are straight. You may be able to really get gay people after watching it.
Needs a More Sympathetic Lead
peterscarpinato2 January 2022
I watched Colton when he was "The Virgin Bachelor" on The Bachelorette. He got far in the competition, no doubt, because of his looks. But I never bought what Colton was selling. I suspected he may be gay or he just made up the virgin story to draw attention to himself and stand out.
When ABC picked him for The Bachelor, I was disappointed. There were other guys in the running who I believed were better and more authentic choices. But The Virgin Bachelor was apparently more interesting. So the viewers watched as he wasted all these women's time. His eventual "winner" was Cassie who was lovely. She didn't feel chemistry and wanted off the show. But Colton (and the Producers) got her to stay. The two began a relationship. Who knows what that relationship looked like but it ended with Cassie filing a restraining order against him for stalking.
Now we have Coming Out Colton. I'm all for a celebrity sharing a coming out story. But is Colton someone to care about? I've seen the first two episodes and found parts of them cringe worthy. His coming out to his mother, father, brother, and best friend is something that should have been done in private. Whether he was truly coming out to them for the first time, or these were re-enactments, he was wrong to put his loved ones in this position. Next for me is the big reveal to his ex high school football coach whom he hadn't seen in years. Unnecessary. The coach seemed mortified being put on the spot.
The show should have focused completely on his life after coming out. Better yet, why not choose a newly out celebrity whose past is less sketchy.
The series does have some important things to say about the difficulties in coming out, especially for athletes. But I found myself more intrigued with Colton's friend, Olympian Gus Kenworthy, who dealt with his own coming out in a much more admirable way.
Colton's ex Cassie made the right move avoiding this whole thing. Colton should take a lesson from her and start living his life in the real world away from reality TV. We've had enough.
When ABC picked him for The Bachelor, I was disappointed. There were other guys in the running who I believed were better and more authentic choices. But The Virgin Bachelor was apparently more interesting. So the viewers watched as he wasted all these women's time. His eventual "winner" was Cassie who was lovely. She didn't feel chemistry and wanted off the show. But Colton (and the Producers) got her to stay. The two began a relationship. Who knows what that relationship looked like but it ended with Cassie filing a restraining order against him for stalking.
Now we have Coming Out Colton. I'm all for a celebrity sharing a coming out story. But is Colton someone to care about? I've seen the first two episodes and found parts of them cringe worthy. His coming out to his mother, father, brother, and best friend is something that should have been done in private. Whether he was truly coming out to them for the first time, or these were re-enactments, he was wrong to put his loved ones in this position. Next for me is the big reveal to his ex high school football coach whom he hadn't seen in years. Unnecessary. The coach seemed mortified being put on the spot.
The show should have focused completely on his life after coming out. Better yet, why not choose a newly out celebrity whose past is less sketchy.
The series does have some important things to say about the difficulties in coming out, especially for athletes. But I found myself more intrigued with Colton's friend, Olympian Gus Kenworthy, who dealt with his own coming out in a much more admirable way.
Colton's ex Cassie made the right move avoiding this whole thing. Colton should take a lesson from her and start living his life in the real world away from reality TV. We've had enough.
Inspiring
alandoran0018 December 2021
Please Stop Supporting Problematic People
paoloadiao6 December 2021
I also read that the Netflix show was originally supposed to be about him and Cassie. But after all the drama happened, they were going to can the show. So Colton mentions that he wants to come out so that he'll still have a show.
As a gay man myself, I am all for being true to yourself. But if you're going to go on a specifically hetero show as the main hetero person (knowing you're gay) , get engaged to a woman, stalk a woman, and then use your coming out to stay famous, then that's not a role model I want for any LGBTQIA individual. But Netflix seems to love highlighting problematic people these days.
As a gay man myself, I am all for being true to yourself. But if you're going to go on a specifically hetero show as the main hetero person (knowing you're gay) , get engaged to a woman, stalk a woman, and then use your coming out to stay famous, then that's not a role model I want for any LGBTQIA individual. But Netflix seems to love highlighting problematic people these days.
Surprisingly good, thoughtful, and absolutely relevant
spartanbuff12 December 2021
Colton Underwood is doing a great public service here by speaking for and up for gay athletes.
This needs to be addressed, and this will help those in need.
Discard the cynicism opined by other reviewers.
Colton is an appealing, sincere guy. I would EXPECT someone in his position to do this; he is a public figure, after all, and there is nothing wrong with taking the opportunity.
I can only think of the hundreds of thousands of gay athletes who will cherish this series - and embolden them to free themselves from the loneliness and isolation of the closet. If this saves one kid from committing suicide, it has served its purpose.
This needs to be addressed, and this will help those in need.
Discard the cynicism opined by other reviewers.
Colton is an appealing, sincere guy. I would EXPECT someone in his position to do this; he is a public figure, after all, and there is nothing wrong with taking the opportunity.
I can only think of the hundreds of thousands of gay athletes who will cherish this series - and embolden them to free themselves from the loneliness and isolation of the closet. If this saves one kid from committing suicide, it has served its purpose.
See also
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