- Chuck Bass: No one cares.
- Blair Waldorf: I do. Don't you understand? I'll always be here. I don't want you going anywhere. I couldn't bear it. So whatever you want to do to yourself, please don't do it to me. Please.
- Chuck Bass: I'm sorry.
- Chuck Bass: [shouts] I'm Chuck Bass!
- [pauses]
- Chuck Bass: No one cares.
- Blair Waldorf: I do. Don't you understand? I'll always be here. I don't want you going anywhere, I couldn't bear it. So whatever you want to do to yourself, please don't do that to me.
- [reaches to Chuck]
- Blair Waldorf: Please!
- Gossip Girl: [voice-over] One thing about being on the top of the world, it gives you a long, long way to fall.
- Jack Bass: [to Chuck] Chuck, your father wouldn't want this.
- Chuck Bass: Fortunately, all I know is what he didn't want... which is me.
- Serena van der Woodsen: [to Blair] Hey, did Jack find Chuck?
- Blair Waldorf: Yeah, what was left of him. I'm surprised they made it through Customs. Chuck's body odor could have given a contact high to half of Manhattan.
- Blair Waldorf: Hey, Eric, have you seen Chuck?
- Eric van der Woodsen: A while ago, he said something about wanting to take a view from above.
- Jack Bass: He probably meant upstairs.
- Blair Waldorf: Clearly you don't know Chuck. He has a thing for the rooftops.
- Eric van der Woodsen: [to Chuck] Welcome back! How was Thailand?
- Chuck Bass: I honestly don't remember.
- Eric van der Woodsen: You should come home, Chuck.
- Chuck Bass: [gets a bottle of scotch] I think I'll take in the view from above. It was nice having you as my little brother.
- Chuck Bass: Uncle Jack, what a surprise. How've you been?
- Jack Bass: Uh-huh, so I take it you don't remember our rickshaw ride down Selon Road? The 15-hour flight?
- Chuck Bass: That was you?
- Jack Bass: Blair, you came to greet us.
- Blair Waldorf: Not you, Chuck. You said you found him.
- Jack Bass: In Bangkok. He was staying at our hotel there. You hear the term "den of iniquity", but until you really see one...
- Blair Waldorf: Do you have him or not?
- [last lines]
- Gossip Girl: [voice-over] Ah, me. The year's scarcely turned and already the secrets have begun. Where will it end this time? The new year isn't about what happened, it's about what's to come. But the past is always with us, just waiting to mess with the present. And when it does, I'll be watching. XOXO. Gossip Girl.
- Serena van der Woodsen: [to Blair] B, is everything okay? I came as fast as I could.
- Blair Waldorf: Fine, false alarm.
- Serena van der Woodsen: Wait, what happened?
- Blair Waldorf: Chuck. He's holed up at Victrola in some Jim Morrison downward spiral, sad in a way. Luckily it's not my concern.
- Blair Waldorf: Chuck, stop. All this doesn't help. It isn't you.
- Chuck Bass: Wrong. Bart may have been a bastard, but he saw me better than anyone. Simply living up to my potential. It's time to let go of your fantasies.
- [first lines]
- Gossip Girl: [voice-over] Gossip Girl here, welcoming you to the new year, when Manhattenites, who flew south for the sun, return to their Park Avenue perches. Which means I have a lot of catching up to do. Word is, Serena van der Woodsen tangoed in the new year in the plazas of Buenos Aires. Guess that means Lonely Boy was all alone when the clock tolled twelve. And what of Little J? Rumor is she's trading runways for hallways. So long high fashion, hello high school.
- Serena van der Woodsen: [to Blair] He was probably thinking about you the whole time he was gone.
- Blair Waldorf: Not unless I was a Thai hooker named Bo.
- Gossip Girl: [voice-over, as Chuck has to assure Headmistress Queller it will never happen again] Pop quiz: What do you get when you cross Chuck Bass, a billion dollars and Bart cold in the ground?
- Chuck Bass: For you, Headmistress, everything.
- [rises in devil-may-care way]
- Gossip Girl: Freefall.
- Chuck Bass: Everybody, it's been a pleasure.
- [lights up his joint]
- Gossip Girl: [voice-over] Spotted at Victrola: Lonely Boy and Chuck Bass having heart to heart. What or who do they have talk about? And will Serena will be the last to know?
- Jack Bass: I get Bart dying has been difficult. But the way things've been handled the last couple weeks, you shut away like Gloria Swanson, my nephew MIA in a Thai bordello, my big brother may not've won parent-of-the-year, but I doubt he'd be too happy.
- Lily van der Woodsen: Well, you needn't worry yourself anymore. Chuck is my stepson. I'll take care of him.
- Jack Bass: Was your stepson. And as Chuck's last living relative, I have to say... I don't feel comfortable leaving him in this situation.
- [blissfully unconcerned]
- Jack Bass: You should eat. People grieving tend to neglect their health.
- Eric van der Woodsen: So you really haven't thought about it?
- [no answer, she just looks at the school she's returning to]
- Eric van der Woodsen: Jenny!
- Jenny Humphrey: Yeah?
- Eric van der Woodsen: I asked if you're nervous about Penelope and the mean girls?
- Jenny Humphrey: Please, Eric... really! Uh... in the past four months, I've faced down Eleanor Waldorf, I've hijacked a society gala, I've had my entire collection torched by a crazy model and was basically homeless, so I can handle high school.
- [Eric gives her a knowing grin]
- Jenny Humphrey: Okay, I'm a little nervous.
- Blair Waldorf: S, I have to tell you something. I did something so stupid.
- Serena van der Woodsen: B, what is it?
- Blair Waldorf: I told Chuck I loved him.
- [shakes her head]
- Serena van der Woodsen: Oh, my gosh, that's great!
- Blair Waldorf: Great? No!
- [shakes her head]
- Blair Waldorf: It's awful! Not only did he not say it back, but he disappeared for a month. I could just... go back and strangle myself as the words come out.
- Serena van der Woodsen: No, I'm sure Chuck will say it back. He was probably thinking about you the whole time he was gone.
- Blair Waldorf: Not unless I was a Thai hooker named Bo. And there's something else...
- Dan Humphrey: [sneaking up on Selena from behind] Hey!
- [kisses her]
- Serena van der Woodsen: Oh, hey. This is my news. When I was in Buenos Aires...
- Blair Waldorf: A postcard would have been fine. I'm really happy for you. I'm gonna go vomit now.
- [walks away]
- Dan Humphrey: [to back of departing Blair] Happy new year.
- Serena van der Woodsen: She just needs time.
- Dan Humphrey: Mm-hmm.
- Jenny Humphrey: Okay, what's with the cold front?
- Rufus Humphrey: Nothing. Eat your breakfast.
- Dan Humphrey: Dad doesn't want me dating Serena.
- Jenny Humphrey: Wait, what? You guys are back together? How did I not know this?
- Rufus Humphrey: I'd rather that we didn't discuss this right now.
- Jenny Humphrey: Dad, Serena's like the best thing that's ever happened to Dan. She's smart and she's funny and she's like nine levels hotter than him.
- [giggles]
- Blair Waldorf: [re Chuck at his burlesque club] Just go home.
- Chuck Bass: Well, that would be rude, since I'm hosting a party here tonight. I posted it on Gossip Girl. Maybe you'll grace us with a dance.