Boston Legal (TV Series)

Happy Trails (2008)

James Spader: Alan Shore

Quotes 

• Ian Hoberman : Nobody was talking to you.

  Alan Shore : You've done nothing but talk about me

  Guest Cowboy : Because you've done nothing but cause trouble.

  Alan Shore : You're an Extra you don't get to talk.

• Attorney Melvin Palmer : [Riding up on horseback]  Well, this is what I call a small world, that's what this is. Look at you, Al...

  Alan Shore : [Groaning]  Oh, Jeez.

  Attorney Melvin Palmer : Snuggling up to your horse like two peas in a pod. Am I right Denny? Whoo-ee ride 'em, Cowboy. To each his own, that's what I say.

  Denny Crane : Who is this guy?

  Attorney Melvin Palmer : Melvin Palmer. I don't believe we've actually met. A pleasure. I am a big fan. Al and I go way back, that's what we do. Hey, we need to be bunkies, that's what we need to do. Home on the range where the deer, the antelope and the three of us play. This is gonna be a Hoot.

  Alan Shore : I wanna go home.

• Alan Shore : [Raising his hand]  I have a problem. These aren't even Cowboy songs. I paid a lot of money for the experience of a lifetime, too. I expected to hear Cowboy songs. How about "Surrey With The Fringe On The Top"? Or "Sweet Betsy From Pike"? "Michael, Row Your Boat Ashore" is a religious song with a nautical theme for the kids. Next we'll have Irene singing in tongues.

  Irene Hoberman : Excuse me?

  Ian Hoberman : I don't want my wife's name out of your dirty mouth.