- Dot Warner: [big forced grin as Pip is shaking her hand and telling a story] I'm going to hurt my brother badly!
- Yakko Warner: [after he sings his song naming most of the planets] Well, there you go. That's our solar system.
- Wakko Warner: You forgot Uranus.
- Yakko Warner: Goodnight, everybody!
- Dot Warner: [after Pip suddenly leaves] It's too quiet!
- Yakko Warner: [chasing after him] Pip! Come back! Tell us another story!
- Dot Warner: Tell us more about bologna!
- Wakko Warner: Have you ever met Don Knotts?
- Pip Pumphandle: [Pip is mindlessly rambling on, dryly] Now, for me, there's nothing more relaxing...
- Wakko Warner: Go away.
- Pip Pumphandle: ...Than a nice, leisurely stroll, like the one I took eight months ago on the 17th. It was a bright, sunny day.
- Wakko Warner: [to audience] This man is scaring me.
- Pip Pumphandle: I love a good pimento loaf and mayo sandwich. The more pimentos, the better. Why, just the mention of pimentos makes my tastebuds stand up and say, "Howdy." Now there's an interesting word: "howdy". Is it from, "How are you?" or maybe, "How you doing?" "Howdy" is one of those strange words that really has no origin. I like saying, "How do?" more than, "Howdy." More formal, I think. Not too flowery.
- Marlon Brando: Columbus understood that the earth wasn't flat, like this.
- [eats pizza]
- Marlon Brando: Or this.
- [eats pie]
- Marlon Brando: Or this.
- [eats ribs]
- Marlon Brando: Au contraire, Columbus knew the earth was round, like this.
- [eats cantaloupe]