Susan Cookson: Maggie Coldwell

Quotes 

• [giving Angus a local injection in his hand] 

  Maggie Coldwell : This shouldn't hurt.

  Angus Deayton : Ow! Why did you say it *wouldn't* hurt when it *did*?

  Maggie Coldwell : Well I suppose pain is comparative, isn't it?

  Angus Deayton : Well you're the expert, but I would have though that jabbing a very large needle into the back of somebody's hand probably does hurt.

  Maggie Coldwell : That's not a large needle.

  Angus Deayton : Well it felt pretty large to me.

  [she shows him a six-inch syringe with a long needle] 

  Maggie Coldwell : *That* is a large needle.

• [the screen that shows how long each patient has been kept waiting has crashed] 

  Maggie Coldwell : [sarcastically]  Oooh. What a shame. How *will* we function without Big Brother?