- Veronica: [Leaving a box of donuts at the station] I know he says he doesn't eat them, but leave a jelly if you know what's good for you.
- Deputy Jerry Sacks: The last time you said that, you didn't actually get any jellies. I almost had a heart attack.
- Keith Mars: I've known three men in your life, Mrs. O'Dell. Two are dead. The great state of California may see to the third.
- Mindy O'Dell: How am I supposed to react to that?
- Keith Mars: Reflexively.
- Veronica: If you're wondering where I am, I'm hanging out outside a convenience store eating corn nuts and watching strippers.
- Keith Mars: Are you doing drugs?
- Veronica: No.
- Keith Mars: Good.
- Wallace: I saw Logan and Parker having lunch.
- Veronica: Here?
- Wallace: Yeah.
- Veronica: In the cafeteria? At lunchtime? God, why doesn't he just run me over with a truck?
- Wallace: I'm just telling you this because it looked like it was something, like they were connecting. What?
- Veronica: I'm just trying to figure out which Gilmore Girl you are.