The Sarah Silverman Program. (TV Series)
Muffin' Man (2007)
Brian Posehn: Brian Spukowski
Photos
Quotes
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Brian : Mannnn, I'm so jonesing for the T-A-B right now.
Steve : Alright. I get it. I shouldn't have asked you to try something new. You can quit punishing me now.
Brian : Why would I punish you Steve, when it's you who released me from a Tab-free prison of my own design, and led me to the discovery of my new favorite beverage... TAB?
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Steve : Is this all you have?
Clerk : Uhh... yeah, I think...
Steve : That's too bad. It's his favorite.
Brian : You don't, like, sell a machine that makes Tab, do you? Wouldn't that be great, then I'd drink it all day. It's funny, I never even tried the stuff before this morning.
Steve : I know, I totally pushed it on him. I was a huge dick about it.
Brian : Oh, in his defense, it is such an important thing, I mean, here was this brand of soda I'd never tried before; you know, and I was about to go my whole life without ever trying it. Which is insane, right? And then I tried it, and now I know, it's the greatest thing ever! And I'm gonna drink it and talk about it for-e-v-er.
Steve : And I'm gonna be right there alongside him, helping him, because I love him.
Clerk : Cool.
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Brian : All I wanted to do was not have that sip, Steve, but you persevered, and I had that sip, and thank Tab I did, because my previous life was just a dream, but now I'm awake!
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Sarah Silverman : Ooh, ooh, Tig! Do you know how many, uh, lesbians it takes to screw in a light bulb?
Tig : Uh-uh, no.
[exits]
Sarah Silverman : Oh.
Brian : She should know that.
Sarah Silverman : Yeah.
Laura Silverman : I think it's three.