- Evelyn Harper: Are you sure you don't want to stay and finish putting on your make-up?
- Lydia: That's okay, I'm done. Would you like to borrow some?
- Evelyn Harper: No, thanks. I'm allergic to the drug store brands.
- Charlie Harper: What?
- Berta: [to Jake] And they call *you* slow.
- Alan Harper: You're kidding, right? You don't see it?
- Charlie Harper: See what?
- Alan Harper: Lydia and Mom?
- Charlie Harper: What about them?
- Berta: Come on, Charlie! The only difference between those two broads is you came out of one and -
- [Charlie cuts her off]
- Lydia: Oh, yes! Evelyn Harper. I recognize you from your bus bench ads. People all over town are sitting on your face!
- Evelyn Harper: Well, dear, maybe someday, if you work hard, people will be sitting on your face, too!
- Lydia: I'll have the seared Ahi Tuna filet.
- Stephan 'Bobby' Wasserstein: Hmm. Good choice.
- Lydia: I want it very rare.
- Stephan 'Bobby' Wasserstein: That's how we serve it.
- Lydia: I want it red in the middle, not pink.
- Stephan 'Bobby' Wasserstein: Shall do.
- Lydia: If it's pink, don't even bother bringing it.
- Stephan 'Bobby' Wasserstein: Got it.
- Lydia: Just give it to someone who doesn't know what *rare* is.
- Stephan 'Bobby' Wasserstein: Of course.
- Lydia: You know what? Forget it. You won't get it right.