Definitely, Maybe (2008)
Isla Fisher: April
Photos
Quotes
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April : Oooh? What are you gonna say?
Will Hayes : I'm still working on it I don't know
April : OH! You should work it on with me you should practice with me; I'm really good at that.
[Walks over to the railing]
April : I'll be Emily.
April : I'm Emily your college sweetheart is there something you wanted to ask me?
Will Hayes : Emily...
April : Wait! You gotta get down on your knee
Will Hayes : No I'm not getting down on my knee
April : [Walks towards Will] She'll like it; she'll like seeing you down on your knee...
Will Hayes : I'm not getting down on my knee
April : [Rolls her eyes and walks back to the railing and turns around] Such a mistake! Okay
Will Hayes : Emily...
April : Yes William?
Will Hayes : Don't make me laugh! Emily will you... um... marry me?
April : No
Will Hayes : Oh my god...
April : What do you mean, 'Will you, um, marry me?' I haven't seen you in weeks! You don't look happy or excited about the prospect of our marriage! You're asking me to give up my - my freedom, my joie de vivre for an institution that fails as often as it succeeds? And why should I marry you anyway? I mean, why do you wanna marry me? Besides some bourgeois desire to fulfil an ideal that society embeds in us from an early age to promote a consumer capitalist agenda?
Will Hayes : Oh! Oh, my God.
April : You should've got on your knee.
Will Hayes : Just shut up! Here... I wanna marry you because you're the first person I wanna look at when I wake up in the morning, and the only one I wanna kiss goodnight. Because the first time that I saw these hands, I couldn't imagine not being able to hold them. But mainly, when you love someone as much as I love you, getting married is the only thing left to do. So, will you, um, marry me?
April : Definitely. Maybe.
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Will Hayes : I kept the book...
April : Yeah?
Will Hayes : Because it was the only thing that I had left of you.
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April : You and me, it'd kinda be like cats and dogs.
Will Hayes : Oil and water.
April : Sand paper and bare ass.
Will Hayes : That's gross.
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April : Pack of American Eagles, blue, please.
Simon : 4.25.
Will Hayes : 4.25? You pay four dollars and twenty-five cents for a pack of cigarettes?
April : They don't put as many chemicals in them.
Will Hayes : So those are healthy cigarettes.
April : Something like that.
Will Hayes : So, if there's not as many chemicals in them they should cost less, not more, don't you think?
April : They put saltpeter in your cigarettes, which make them burn faster, which make you smoke more. Which means, at the end of the day, your cigarettes actually cost more, not less.
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April : I don't know and I don't know how to know, you know?
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April : You know what's really cool?
Will Hayes : I don't.
April : We can just sit hear and not have to worry about flirting, or all the attraction stuff.
Will Hayes : Yea, all that stuff...
April : Very cool.
[long pause]
Will Hayes : Yea...
April , Will Hayes : [make out for about 10 seconds then freeze]
Will Hayes : [sits up]
Will Hayes : I got to go
Will Hayes : [quickly leaves]
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Will Hayes : You think it's ridiculous that I want to be a politician, don't you?
April : [laughing] Yes.
Will Hayes : Thank you.
April : No, no, I get the whole politician thing. It's easy to like you.
Will Hayes : That's true, that's very true.
April : I just wonder if you want people to like you a little too much.
Will Hayes : That's also true. I should want them to hate me. I'm gonna start working on that right away, you got any tips for me?
April : [laughing] No, you're off to a great start, I'm hating you already.
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[about Clinton's affair]
Russell T. McCormack : Arms for oil, no problem. But a little 'oral-ness' and you're headed for impeachment.
Will Hayes : Maybe he should be impeached.
Kelly : Whoa, whoa, whoa, you did not just say that!
[Russell, Gareth and Anne make similar exclamations]
April : You love him!
Will Hayes : We all did! We thought he was gonna be different then the other jokers, but this guy, he can't even define the word 'is'! What happens if they give him one of the hard words, like 'truth'?
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April : So Emily is what, like your college sweetheart?
Will Hayes : It's amazing how you do that.
April : What?
Will Hayes : The way you take the simplest statement and then you twist it with a completely negative connotation. It's really, actually, impressive.
April : [laughing] I didn't mean to do that. I actually think it's very sweet.
Will Hayes : See, you did it again!
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Will Hayes : I haven't had sex since Clinton was re-elected.
April : Why bother? He's having enough sex for the entire country.
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April : You're the toilet paper guy.
Will Hayes : Yes, I am in fact the toilet paper guy, but feel free to cal me the bagel-and-coffee guy. Or, Todd in accounting calls me Chrystal, which I'm pretty sure is a girl's name.
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April : Don't make me staple your head.
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April : And it felt life changing and - and I realized I had to tell someone. When I realized who that person was, it was so unexpected.
Ring Salesman : [the Ring Salesman enters and presents a ring to Will] Here we are sir.
April : It's like when something is staring at you in the face. And you're too blind to
[April notices the ring]
April : see it. What's that?
Will Hayes : ...I have some news for you too.
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Will Hayes : You see, I don't want a fling. I want the real deal.
April : Forget about the real deal. You don't find *it*. *It* finds *you*.
Will Hayes : What does that mean? I don't know what that means.
April : It means that you get to a certain age, and then you're ready. You know, you're ready for... kids, or a commitment, or, you know...
Café Gitane Night Waitress : Sir?
Will Hayes : Yeah.
April : ...a mortgage.
Will Hayes : The table's ready.
April : Okay. You know what I mean? And the person that you're with then, they become the one.
Will Hayes : So you're saying it's not who, but it's when.
April : Exactly.
