- Karen Walker: Honey, no no... she can't move into his place. That's not acceptable!
- Jack McFarland: Tell me about it, you feisty little Shih Tzu!
- Grace Adler: Will, the Dodgers left Brooklyn in 1958.
- Will Truman: Oh sweety, you know I don't follow the volleyball.
- Will Truman: You broke another wine glass, didn't you?
- Jack McFarland: Welcome to cynical island. Population, you.
- Will Truman: And must you always let that bird out of its cage?
- Jack McFarland: Hey, birds gotta fly, fish gotta swim. Will's gotta lighten up.
- Grace Adler: I want to marry the one.
- Karen Walker: And well you should, honey. How else are you going to get to the two and three?