- Donna Moss: [Donna is on the phone with her former high school teacher who is retiring] I just wanted to say... I don't know, I just... I just wanted to say... I don't know
- Mrs. Morello: Are you sure everything's alright?
- President Josiah "Jed" Bartlet: Tell her where you are.
- Donna Moss: Mrs. Morello, I'm in the Oval Office with the President of the United States and it's because of you.
- President Josiah "Jed" Bartlet: Can I tell you what's messed up about James Bond?
- Charlie Young: Nothing.
- President Josiah "Jed" Bartlet: Shaken, not stirred, will get you cold water with a dash of gin and dry vermouth. The reason you stir it with a special spoon is so not to chip the ice. James is ordering a weak martini and being snooty about it.
- C.J. Cregg: You haven't had a drink since you were 22?
- John Hoynes: That's right.
- C.J. Cregg: Ulysses S. Grant would have slapped you in the face.
- John Hoynes: He did once.
- President Josiah "Jed" Bartlet: If only technology could invent some way to get in touch with you in an emergency. Some sort of telephonic device with a personalized number we could call to let you know that we needed you. Perhaps it would look something
- [Bartlet grabs Leo's pager from its belt case]
- President Josiah "Jed" Bartlet: like *this*, Mr. Moto!
- Sam Seaborn: Is this ser... I mean, are you talking about names?
- Josh Lyman: Fitzwallace, Leo, and Ulysses S. Grant.
- Donna Moss: I had an English teacher in 12th-Grade named Molly Morello, and she was one of those teachers, and she's retiring...
- Josh Lyman: [interrupting] For me, it was Mr. Fieg, for American History A.P. and Con Law
- Donna Moss: Right, unusual as it may seem, we're talking about me.