- Jack Malloy: [re the two cheerleaders upstairs] Hey, Floppy! What has four legs and can make a man truly happy?
- Mr. Floppy: Why? Are we moving to Alabama, Jack?
- [first lines]
- Ryan Malloy: Look at this, sis. I'm in the school paper. "Stupid jock Ryan Malloy copies off the Asian student"... Look at Ling Chow, all concentrated...
- [Tiffany giggles]
- Ryan Malloy: The dope! I'm the one who got my name in the paper! Put that in your egg drop soup, Ling! I gotta thank whoever wrote this. You know anybody down at the paper named T. Malloy?
- Tiffany Malloy: No. I'll ask around.
- Ryan Malloy: Do it for me, will ya?
- Ryan Malloy: [re cheerleaders] Don't you just love 'em? You know, we fight a lot harder when they cheer. And it's not just the short dresses and the tight sweaters or the way they jump around. It's what they're saying: "Look up my dress! Look at them bounce!"
- Tiffany Malloy: You know, Ryan, I *really* don't think that's what they're saying.
- Ryan Malloy: Well, that's what I hear!
- Tiffany Malloy: That's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna write an expose about how cheerleaders are just shallow, petty, sexual stereotypes that are as out of date as a white basketball player.
- Cricket: [after cheerleader practice] Hey, let's go to my house and watch Sleepless in Seattle. It has been almost forty-eight hours!
- Tiffany Malloy: What about if we watch Meg in When Harry Met Sally?
- [but that one finds no approval]
- Tiffany Malloy: Okay. How about Meg in Courage Under Fire?
- Cherri: Like, how un-Meg. I mean, she had short hair!
- Cricket: Duh!
- Cherri: Yeah, she is like truly only ultimate Meg *with long hair!*
- Tiffany Malloy: Look, I'm sorry, but I beg to differ.
- Cherri: [squeals] I don't like you!
- Tiffany Malloy: Yeah?
- [yells:]
- Tiffany Malloy: Well, I don't like you! And what's more, I don't like Meg Ryan!
- Cherri: You are off the squad!
- Cricket, Cherri: O-F-F off!
- Tiffany Malloy: [stands regarding them for a while] I was gonna give up the school newspaper for you girls.
- Cherri: Oh, big whizz-bang! I mean, all they do at the newspaper is, like, ruin people and their reputations!
- Tiffany Malloy: You're right!
- [devious smile, she knows what she's going to do]