Kevin Connolly: Ryan Malloy

Quotes 

• Ryan Malloy : [to Ross]  It can't be so difficult to get me a date. I mean, I look at myself naked in the mirror all the time. I'm anatomically correct. Girls are just.. so stupid. I don't need 'em, I don't want 'em, I can live without the human warmth and comfort I've heard a pair of breasts can give you.

  [sighs] 

  Ryan Malloy : If I don't get a woman soon, I'll kill you.

• Ryan Malloy : Did you - Did you get me a date?

  Tiffany Malloy : [lost a bet, we're saddled with mission impossible]  Damn Raiders!

  [resignedly:] 

  Tiffany Malloy : I truly am amazing. They can't get peace in the Middle East, but I got you... a date.