Unhappily Ever After (TV Series)
Exorcising Jennie (1997)
Deborah Kellner: Muffy
Quotes
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[first lines]
Muffy : [as Tiffany enters college library wearing short black dress] Tiffy, you look great! I can't wait till my mother dies so that I can wear black!
Tiffany Malloy : I get to park in all the handicapped spots too!
Muffy : Because your mother's dead?
Tiffany Malloy : No! Because I'm wearing this dress! I can do anything I want, the cops just smile and wave.
[waves]
Tiffany Malloy : They're outside right now, washing my car.
Muffy : Don't you miss your Mom?
Tiffany Malloy : Who? Oh, yes, yes, very much, but she's still kind of, uh, with us in *spirit.*
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Tiffany Malloy : [Ryan enters the library with a brown paper bag wafting eerily behind him] Ryan, what are you doing?
Ryan Malloy : Mom brought me my lunch. She wanted to come haunt us in school. She's more fun than a barrel of dead monkeys!
Muffy : [can't figure this out] How do you do that?
Ryan Malloy : Well, actually, us magicians do not like to tell, but... I got a dead mother! She's a ghost.
Jennie Malloy : [appears] Ta-dah!
[but can only be seen by her children]
Muffy : How come I can't see her?
Ryan Malloy : Well, nobody saw that Ted Danson show either. Doesn't mean it didn't exist.
Tiffany Malloy : [to her mother] Will you please stop touching my hair? How would you like it if I did that to your hair?
Muffy : You're lucky. I'd much rather have a dead mother touching me than my live uncle.
Jennie Malloy : [to Tiffany] Oh, come on! Lighten up! Have some fun too! Well, you don't have that many years left. I looked in the Big Book.
Tiffany Malloy : I'm dying soon?
[voice catching]
Jennie Malloy : No, I'm kidding!
[laughs]
Jennie Malloy : Oh, it's just the scamp in me! I'm kinda like a cross between Casper and Della Reese. Now, if you'll excuse me, I sold all the clothes from the football team, and practice is *just* about over. Time for my own little *hot butt contest!*
Ryan Malloy : Oh, that Mom! I haven't had this much fun with a dead person since the time we put that hamster in Grandma's coffin!
Tiffany Malloy : [remembers happily] Whoo-hoo!