Two and a Half Men (TV Series)

The Salmon Under My Sweater (2004)

Conchata Ferrell: Berta

Quotes 

• Alan Harper : But the truth is, you and I see each other every day, and we really don't know much about each other.

  Berta : So, you want to know what goes on underneath this gruff exterior? Whether somewhere inside me there's a tiny little girl who once dreamed of being a famous ballerina?

  Alan Harper : Is there?

  Berta : If there is, it's because I accidentally ate one, and haven't passed her yet. Let me tell you, I am dreading that tiara.