That '70s Show (TV Series)

Kitty's Birthday (That's Today?!) (2001)

Ashton Kutcher: Michael Kelso

Photos 

Quotes 

• Michael Kelso : Right now, I'm just Jackie's friend. But what she doesn't realize is that I'm also a boy. And eventually, 'friend' is gonna lead down the path to 'boy', and then I'll be her friend-boy.

• Michael Kelso : See, I did some reflecting, and I realized that Jackie is the only girl I want to be with.

  Eric Forman : Today?

• Michael Kelso : Man, what fun is it being a girlfriend if you don't even have your own boobs to play with?

• Fez : I was just showing Caroline the back of my new car and my tongue.

  Michael Kelso : Fez, this isn't your car.

  Jackie Burkhart : Yeah, foreigners can't drive here unless it's a cab.

• Jackie Burkhart : Ugh, would you look at those boobs!

  Michael Kelso : Uh, I *am*! It's disgusting! I mean, what is she even thinking, packing in those sweet melons like that? I can't even look away!