- Lionel Whitney: Of course you know this is a federal building and that you're committing a federal crime on federal property and that the forces of the federal government will be brought to bear against you.
- Victor Gardenia: I'm not interested in jurisdictional prerogatives. I'm only interested in what I want, nothing else. I what I want right now is for you to get in that Sedan.
- Victor Gardenia: Now, I will pay you five hundred dollars for your time and a bonus of...
- E.L. 'Tenspeed' Turner: Yeah?
- Victor Gardenia: Ten thousand, should you recover an object, which is quite important to me. A personal momento which has no great financial value, but great sentimental appeal.
- E.L. 'Tenspeed' Turner: Sounds good.
- Victor Gardenia: Ah, then we have a deal.
- E.L. 'Tenspeed' Turner: What is it you're looking for?
- Victor Gardenia: I can't tell you that right now, but perhaps this afternoon we could meet at a place of mutual convenience?
- E.L. 'Tenspeed' Turner: Yeah, sure, this afternoon, fine.
- Victor Gardenia: Very good. Might I have my gun please? Now that we are partners I see no reason for you to hold it on me like some kind of gangster.
- E.L. 'Tenspeed' Turner: Yeah, give 'em his gun, come on, go ahead.
- [Brown Shoe hands over Gardenia's gun]
- Victor Gardenia: Thank you.
- [points it at Tenspeed and Brown Shoe]
- Victor Gardenia: You will raise your hands over your heads and step backwards into the room.
- Prof. Harlan Davidson: Victor, perhaps you would like to take them away and indulge your vulgar taste for violence?
- Lionel Whitney: How can you think of yourself at a time like this? They've kidnapped your wife.
- Marty Boxx: Come on, I met the old broad once. You think she's worried about my nose?
- Marty Boxx: How dare you speak of her in that manner? She's a countess of the imperial house of Romanov, the fact that she's also a cleaning lady doesn't give you the license to...
- Marty Boxx: [interrupting] Hey! Hey, hold the phone. What are you talking about? Cleaning lady?
- Lionel Whitney: That's right, and the best there is, too.
- Marty Boxx: [louder] Cleaning lady?
- [to Tenspeed]
- Marty Boxx: You married me off to a cleaning lady for a quarter of a million dollars?