- Officer Bernie Glassman: [Bernie and Starsky have found Hutch and have discovered he's addicted to heroin] I've got to make a report!
- Det. Dave Starsky: No! No report. This didn't happen, Bernie. Understand? This didn't happen.
- Huggy Bear: And one more thing... When you see Hutch, you tell him that he owes me one good waitress.
- Capt. Harold Dobey: [sees Starsky walking past his office with a candy bar in his mouth] Starsky!
- Det. Dave Starsky: [muffled from the candy bar] Mornin', Cap'n.
- Capt. Harold Dobey: [angrily] *Get in here!* It's the middle of the afternoon! Where's that partner of yours?
- Det. Dave Starsky: It's his day off, Captain.
- Capt. Harold Dobey: His day off ended this morning. Now suppose you stop covering for him, get your tail on the horn, and tell him I said get his rear end in here!
- Det. Dave Starsky: The truth is, Captain, he's sick.
- Capt. Harold Dobey: He ain't called in sick!
- Det. Dave Starsky: Well, you know how it is, he's in love.
- Capt. Harold Dobey: What you mean is he's shacked up.
- Det. Dave Starsky: Yeah, well, uh... she *is* a pretty girl, Captain.
- Capt. Harold Dobey: [completely uncharmed] You tell him I want him in here in one hour, and ready for duty. You tell him that.
- Det. Dave Starsky: There's only one problem, Captain.
- Capt. Harold Dobey: What's that?
- Det. Dave Starsky: I don't know where he is to tell him that.
- Det. Dave Starsky: [Starsky has just found Hutch's gun in his apartment and knows something has happened to him] I'm telling you, he's gone!
- Capt. Harold Dobey: No he isn't. He's out on a date with a beautiful girl, to use your words.
- Det. Dave Starsky: [frustrated] Captain, you don't understand!
- Capt. Harold Dobey: What do you mean, I don't understand?
- Det. Dave Starsky: I found his gun back in his apartment.
- Capt. Harold Dobey: [skeptical] Do you take that gun out with you when you go on a date?
- Det. Dave Starsky: [angrily] Hutch wouldn't visit his *mother* without a gun!
- Capt. Harold Dobey: [firmly] All right, Starsky settle down!
- [Starsky calms down]
- Capt. Harold Dobey: What do you think happened to him?
- Det. Dave Starsky: [crossly] I don't know.
- Capt. Harold Dobey: Well, you know about that girl.
- Det. Dave Starsky: I know her name, I know where she lives...
- Capt. Harold Dobey: And?
- Det. Dave Starsky: I can't find her, either.
- Capt. Harold Dobey: What do you want to do about it?
- Det. Dave Starsky: Missing Persons?
- Capt. Harold Dobey: That's a 'missing officer.'
- Det. Dave Starsky: No, I mean 'missing partner.'
- Ben Forest: Hi, baby.
- Jeanie Walton: How'd you find me?
- Ben Forest: Where do you go when you're lookin' for something? You go to the cops. Even a cop named Hutch.
- Jeanie Walton: You're lying. He wouldn't tell you.
- [She realizes something bad has happened]
- Jeanie Walton: What did you do to him?
- Ben Forest: You'll see, baby. You'll see.