- Harold March: I could never understand why people get so uptight over human sexuality.
- Katrina: Or why someone would wait till the third date. Am I right, Harold?
- Harold March: Why do you hate yourself, Kat?
- [first lines]
- Kevin: Here's your book, Mr. Miller; I'm sorry it took so long.
- Stuart Miller: Kevin, there's like ten books here. And not one of them is the one I asked for.
- Kevin: Oh, it isn't?
- Stuart Miller: Nope.
- Kevin: I'm so sorry. I forgot which book you wanted, and I didn't want to bother you. I remembered it had the word, uh, 'Under' in the title, and so I brought all the books I could find with that word.
- Stuart Miller: Kevin, I said you could find it 'under' Biographies.
- Kevin: You did? I'm so stupid. OK, I'm on it.
- Stuart Miller: Hey, Kevin! You know the name of the book?
- [last lines]
- Kevin: [mimicking Skylar] I'm Skylar. I've blond hair. Toodle-loodle-loo.
- Skyler Dayton: [laughing] That's great, Kevin.
- Kevin: When I walk I shake my booty like this. Teedle-leedle-lee.
- Skyler Dayton: [laughs] I do shake my booty like that, right?
- Kevin: I dress like a teenager, even though I'm forty years old.
- Skyler Dayton: Ha ha ha-ha-ha. You're fired!
- Stuart Miller: Cheedle-leedle-lee,