Photos
Quotes
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Brian : Chaos Theory!
Tim : Eh?
Brian : The predictability of random events. The notion that reality as we know it, past, present and future is actually a mathematically predictable preordained system.
Daisy : So somewhere out their in the vastness of the unknown is an equation... for predicting the future!
Brian : An equation so complex as to utterly defy any possibility of comprehension by even the most brilliant human mind, but an equation nonetheless.
Tim : Oh my God!
Brian : What?
Tim : I've got some fucking Jaffa Cakes in my coat pocket!
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Tim : Mike I'll see you here at 22.00 hours. Everybody else, I'll see you here at ten!
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[Tim, Daisy and Brian have all just watched the original Star Wars trilogy]
Tim : Brian, did you notice that everything that transpired in those three films - and I *mean* everything - can be attributed to the actions of one very *minor* character?
Brian : Who?
Tim : The gunner on the Star Destroyer at the beginning of the first film.
Brian : How come?
Tim : [know-it-all] Well. Hmmhmmhmm. Because, if the gunner *had* shot the pod that C-3P0 and R2 were in, they wouldn't have got to Tatooine, they wouldn't have met Luke, Luke wouldn't have met Ben, they wouldn't have met Han and Chewie, they wouldn't have rescued Princess Leia. *None* of it would have happened.
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Bilbo Bagshot : I used to know this guy, Minty. He had a dog who he'd train to attack rich people. He was into the whole class-war thing. He called the dog Gramsci after an Italian Marxist. Rumor has it, it could smell wealth from up to 20 feet. The thing is, it all backfired. Minty won 100 grand on a scratchcard and Gramsci bit his knees off.
Tim : That's terrible.
Bilbo Bagshot : Not really. He used the money to buy new knees.
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Tim : I mean, it's a fact, sure as day follows night, sure as eggs is eggs, sure as every odd-numbered Star Trek movie is shit.
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[Daisy and Brian are discussing the Chaos Theory]
Tim Bisley : Oh my God.
Daisy Steiner : What?
Tim Bisley : I've got some fucking Jaffa Cakes in my coat pocket.
[They all cheer]
Tim Bisley : Oh Mama, oh Daddy, let's all play kabaddi!
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Daisy Steiner : If Richard phones tell him I'm out with Colin.
Bilbo Bagshot : Who's Richard?
Tim Bisley : Boyfriend.
Bilbo Bagshot : Your boyfriend?
Tim Bisley : Daisy's boyfriend.
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Daisy : In the end, our relationship was just like a sandwich toaster. You know, you just forget you've got one. And it just sits there on the top of the cupboard collecting a layer of greasy fudge. And even if you do see it you just assume it's broken, you think if it's working I'd be using it all the time, but you don't and it just sits there. Then one day, you get an overwhelming desire for toasted sandwiches, you know? And you get it down and it works, and you can't believe it, you know? And then you make every kind of toasted sandwich there is, you have toasted sandwich parties. You make Marmite and cheese, chocolate and...
Tim : Pilchards.
Daisy : Banana and...
Bilbo Bagshot : Acorns.
Daisy : Acorns. And then as quickly as the desire comes, it just goes. And then you put the toaster sandwich maker away. And, you know what?
Tim : What?
Daisy : You don't miss it.
Bilbo Bagshot : So what you're saying is 'Don't hide the toasted sandwich maker away, use him regularly and you'll get the most out of him'.
Tim : No, she's saying 'Chuck your boyfriend, have a sandwich'.
