- Marge: Say bye bye to our house, Maggie! Bye bye tree!
- Homer Simpson: Bye bye, work!
- Bart: Bye bye, toothbrush
- Lisa: Bye bye, Lisa Simpson
- [At the Flanders's beach house, after spotting Lisa's friends pasting seashells onto his car]
- Homer Simpson: Sweet merciful crap! My car!
- [the school bell rings]
- Milhouse: School's out! Up yours, Krabappel!
- [Milhouse runs off, no one else moves]
- Mrs. Krabappel: Well, I'm glad the rest of you remembered that summer vacation starts at the end of the day, not the beginning.
- [Krabappel motions to a clock that reads; 9 am]
- Lisa: [to herself] Okay, okay calm down, it was just a bird, you don't control the birds, you will someday but not today.
- Bart: [after Bart exposes Lisa as a nerd to her friends] Hey, Lise. I guess my little yearbook stunt was pretty rough but it did teach you a lesson. It's important to be yourself.
- Lisa: [grabbing him by the shirt, through clenched teeth] I know EXACTLY who I am. I am the sister of a rotten, jealous, MEAN little sneak! You cost me my only friends! You've ruined my life!
- Homer Simpson: I'll bet this place sells illegal fireworks. Just go in and act casual like you buy'em all the time.
- [goes up to the clerk; casually]
- Homer Simpson: Hi, um, let me have one of those porno magazines, large box of condoms, a bottle of Old Harper, couple of those panty shields
- [speaks quickly]
- Homer Simpson: And some illegal fireworks,
- [speaks normally]
- Homer Simpson: And one of those disposable enemas. Nah, make it two.
- Val-U Mart Owner: My apologies, sir, but the sale of fireworks is prohibited in this state and is punishable by a...
- [only other customer in the store leaves]
- Val-U Mart Owner: Follow me.
- Homer Simpson: And you're sure the Flanderses won't be there? Well, it sounds great. Bart, you can invite Milhouse.
- Marge: Lisa, you can bring a friend too.
- Lisa: Hey, great! A friend-
- [mumbling]
- Lisa: or a companion or- I don't know- a stuffed animal.
- Homer Simpson: [Reading] "Wel-diddly-elcome, Simpsons."
- [Groans]
- Homer Simpson: He actually wrote 'diddly'!
- Bart: i guess my year book stunt was pretty rough but it did teach you a lesson its inportant to be yourself.