The Simpsons (TV Series)
Separate Vocations (1992)
Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Machine Operator, Mayor Quimby, Groundskeeper Willie, Lawyer in Bart's Fantasy, Mr. Glascock, Panicking Teacher #2, Hippie
Quotes
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Principal Skinner : How would you like to be a hall monitor?
Bart Simpson : Wouldn't that mean squealing on other kids?
Principal Skinner : That's the meat of it.
Bart Simpson : Hmm...
[in Bart's daydream, he is testifying in a murder trial, his face and voice electronically disguised]
Prosecutor : Now, Witness X would you please tell the court what you saw?
Bart's Electronically Altered Voice : I'd be more than happy to. I saw Mr. Montone there seal Mr. Palaccio in an oil drum and roll him off the pier.
Mr. Montone : [pulls a knife] I kill you!
[he lunges toward the witness stand and grabs Bart]
Bart's Electronically Altered Voice : Ay, caramba!
[back in reality]
Bart Simpson : ...I don't know.
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Mr. Flascock : This is a great day for me! I thought I could never teach again.
Principal Skinner : Oh, times have changed. There will be no more mockery of your name, Mr. Flascock.
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Lisa : [Lisa's just discovered her future vocation after a career aptitude test.] A homemaker! I might as well be dead!
Marge : Lisa, it's not that bad.
Homer : So, what are you gonna be, boy?
Bart Simpson : Policeman.
Homer : [Chokes on food.]
Marge : Oh, that's nice, Bart. You know, your father wanted to be a policeman for a little while, but they said he was too heavy.
Homer : No, the army said I was too heavy. The police said I was too dumb.