Scrubs (TV Series)
My Day at the Races (2006)
Judy Reyes: Nurse Carla Espinosa
Quotes
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Carla : Fine, you can't live with Elliot, but you're not living with us so get your crap out by Friday.
J.D. : Friday? Friday's my birthday. I've already e-vited everyone to a party at our place.
Carla : Whose place?
J.D. : Your place. Look I can't just un-e-vite everyone. I've got two e-yeses and 24 e-maybes. That's a lot of e-sponses.
Carla : Bambi, I'm gonna put my e-foot up your ass.
J.D. : It's a Mexican themed fiesta on the first anniversary of my 29th birthday. That means I'm turning thirty. Donde? 56 Walnut Drive. Cuando? Thank you for asking, ocho-thirty until upside down question mark. Sombreros at the door. Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrooooh!
Turk : I'll be there.
J.D. : Gracias, amigo.
[to Carla]
J.D. : I borrowed one of your dictionaries.
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Carla : Fine, you can't live with Elliot, but you're not living with us, so get your crap up by Friday.
J.D. : Friday?
Carla : Friday!
J.D. : Friday's my birthday. I've already e-vited everyone to a party at our place.
Carla : Whose place?
J.D. : Your place. Look, I can't just un-e-vite everyone. I already got 2 e-yeses and 24 e-maybes. That's a lot of e-sponses.
Carla : Babmi, I'm gonna put my e-foot up your ass.
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Dr. Cox : Jordan, here's the plan: I'm gonna go ahead and and cram an entire evening's worth of drinking into the next five minutes. Now, you just make sure not to engage them. Be particularly aware of the blonde talky one - I've worked with her before - she has no off button.
Carla : [to Elliot] If money is so tight, why not have Jake move in with you?
Jordan : Who's Jake?
Dr. Cox : Jordan!... No!
Elliot : He's this guy that I've been going out with for a while, but we're not ready to move in. He's a little closed-off, you know?
Jordan : [Pointing at Cox behind her hand] Uh, sweetie, are you aware of who I live with?
Dr. Cox : Jordan Godzilla Sullivan! You stop that, and you stop it now!
Jordan : Why don't you try talking to humans for once? You might enjoy it!
Carla : Elliot, maybe you should be the one to open Jake up? You know like Turk can be a little... immature - you know, like I always have to talk about my feelings over dinner or shut off his iPod during sex. I bet you could do the same thing with Jake.
Dr. Cox : Or... maybe you could pressure him, get dumped, throw on fifty pounds, start collecting knick-knacks and meet your future now. You know... before the loneliness burns too much?
[Hopping in his seat]
Dr. Cox : Wooooo-ohhhhh!
[Laughing]
Dr. Cox : Gosh, I did enjoy that!
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J.D. : That's it! I'll do the triathlon!
Carla : Oh, you don't know anything about triathlons!
J.D. : Well, I didn't know anything about cereal inventing, either, Carla. And yet if it wasn't for a certain harshly-worded cease and desist letter, we'd all be eating J.D.'s Bananas & Nuts.
Carla : You're not serious about this, are you?
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Turk : What the hell was I thinking?
Carla : No, you did great, baby.
Dr. Kelso : She's right, Turkleton. Hell, without anesthesia, you made it halfway through a surgery. I bet you could publish that.
Dr. Cox : Maybe they'll put it in Almost Magazine.
Dr. Kelso : You know, Perry, it wouldn't hurt you to make some noise around here.
Dr. Cox : How's this? Blow it out your ass, Bob.
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Turk : I can't do this. I don't believe in any of this hypnotism crap! I only needed to impress Kelso!
Carla : Oh, so great, you lied to me!
Turk : I'm about to ruin my career by plunging a knife into a completely conscious person! But you know what? You're absolutely right. Let's focus on the lying.
