Roseanne (TV Series)

Like, a New Job (1990)

Roseanne Barr: Roseanne Conner

Quotes 

• Becky Conner : [just learned that Roseanne's new job is in the mall where Becky hangs out with her friends]  My *mother* is going to be there!

  Roseanne Conner : Yeah, it's a kick in the head, ain't it.

  Becky Conner : [shouts]  You've ruined my life!

  Roseanne Conner : Well, you don't think I took the job for the money, do ya?

• Darlene Conner : [on the phone]  Yeah! I'd love to... Friday night? Yeah, I was hoping you'd call... You wanna buy me dinner?... Oh, gee, what's in it for you?... Oh sure I put out, everybody knows that!

  Roseanne Conner : Darlene, what are you doing?

  Darlene Conner : Oh, don't worry Mom, he thinks it's Becky.

• Roseanne Conner : You know, I'm gonna be working the dinner shift, so that means you gotta take over around here.

  Dan Conner : Don't worry, I can handle it.

  Roseanne Conner : Yeah, well, you know, that means that you gotta feed the kids once in a while, you gotta maintain law and order around here, and you have to keep 'em from killin' each other.

  Dan Conner : Better write this down.

• Roseanne Conner : [about leaving her job at the hair salon, and starting one in a restaurant]  Well the way I look at it, I'm still working with hair, only now it's in the food.

• Roseanne Conner : [in Rodbell's]  Just go have a seat, I'll be right with ya.

  Becky Conner : All right. But do me a favor, and don't come over and act like you're my mother or something, okay?

  Roseanne Conner : So, what... then like, breast-feeding you is out?

  [leaving Becky looking mortified]