- Bob Jenkins (segment "Hate Puppet"): You're late.
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): Uh, yeah I know. I'm sorry about that.
- Bob Jenkins (segment "Hate Puppet"): You've been late three times in two years.
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): Yeah, that doesn't really strike me as excessive.
- Bob Jenkins (segment "Hate Puppet"): You know what I've never really liked about you Harris? You've got a lousy work ethic; you're lazy, sloppy, and when you get right down to it, just plain stupid.
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): You know Bob, normally I really appreciate your humor, but today I'm really not in the mood for it.
- Bob Jenkins (segment "Hate Puppet"): Get out!
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): Excuse me?
- Bob Jenkins (segment "Hate Puppet"): You heard me. Or should I add deaf to the list? You know what, don't answer that, it's a waste of my time. Clean out your desk, you're through here.
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): Bob, wait hold on, wait a minute, what's going on?
- Bob Jenkins (segment "Hate Puppet"): I said get out! You're fired, is that clear enough for you?
- William Price (segment "Hate Puppet"): The bearded man's gestures were deliberate and precise. But their significance was lost in antiquity. Not so his words. Andrew didn't understand the obscure Russian dialect spitting out at him, and perhaps, that was for the best. Because what the bearded man had said to him was this: "You have filled me with hate, and so hate shall fill those around you."
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): Linda.
- Linda (segment "Hate Puppet"): Hey babe, how was your day?
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): Uh, not... not so good. Just after I spoke to you this morning I uh... I ran into this weird guy on the street. And he cursed me.
- Linda (segment "Hate Puppet"): That's so bizarre. You'll never guess what I found in the bookstore today, it's about a character with your name. It even looks like you on the cover, isn't that cool?
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): No, no it's really not. Linda, that book is about me.
- Linda (segment "Hate Puppet"): What?
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): I got fired from my job today. I got attacked and nearly killed. And everything that has happened to me is in there written down on these pages.
- Linda (segment "Hate Puppet"): I see...
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): No, it's true, look, give me the book.
- Linda (segment "Hate Puppet"): Why?
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): Because I have to know what's going to happen next.
- Linda (segment "Hate Puppet"): You can't seriously believe...
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): Listen to me, you don't understand. I can't escape. If it is written in here it's going to happen to me. So please just give me the book.
- Linda (segment "Hate Puppet"): No! You're delusional. I'm not going to feed your fantasy.
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): Please, just listen to me. It's the curse.
- Linda (segment "Hate Puppet"): There's no such thing as a curse.
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): Then you tell me why, why are you doing this? When I left this house this morning to go to work, we loved each other. And you loved me. What happened to make that change?
- Linda (segment "Hate Puppet"): Maybe I just finally realized how pathetic you are. Blaming all of your failures, your stupidity, on a book! It's disgusting. You know what I see when I look at you, I see a weak pathetic man, and all I feel for you is hate!
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): This is all your fault. You wrote it. It's your book. Your words. You took hold of my life. You're going to write me a sequel! And it's going to start with me waking up today and realizing that everything that has happened to me... was just a terrible dream.
- William Price (segment "Hate Puppet"): I'm sorry... I don't understand. Who are you?
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): I'm your hero... Andrew Harris. And you're going to write what I want you to, or else I'm going to splatter your brains all over your desk! How about that for a horror story?
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): [holding gun to Price's head as Price types story] He woke up. And turned to see his wife. Sleeping beside him. She was alive. It had all just been a bad dream.
- William Price (segment "Hate Puppet"): It's... it's a little flat.
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): Write it!
- William Price (segment "Hate Puppet"): [as police arrive] Please. Don't make this any harder on yourself. The best thing you can do is to give up.
- Andy Harris (segment "Hate Puppet"): No. I did that a while ago. My fate is in your hands.
- Bartender (segment "Hate Puppet"): So he shot himself?
- William Price (segment "Hate Puppet"): Yes, just like in my book. Fans... fanatics. They see a tiny fragment of themselves in some character in a story, and they think it's all about them. And since Mr. Harris believed he was my character and he was cursed, he had no other way out.