- Sid: Please welcome Miss Greece!
- [Max enters in a flowing Greek robe, with a long hemline that makes him look a bit effeminate]
- Maximillian Papandrious: [glaring at Sid] Hokay...
- Sid: Ohhhh, oh I'm so sorry, MISTER Greece!
- Jeremy Brown: What's it like wearing that, Max?
- Maximillian Papandrious: Hit's a bit cold, boss!
- [Giovanni pops up in a pinstripe suit, fedora, guitarcase and cigar]
- Jeremy Brown: Are you representing Italy, or the Mafia?
- Giovanni Cupello: [in a "Don Corleone" voice] I represent Sicily!
- Sid: Let me introduce the lovely Mister Spain!
- [Juan enters wearing a matador's outfit]
- Juan Cervantes: Olé!
- Giovanni Cupello: [about Harold the Conqueror] Maybe he was a-killed by Robin the Hood!
- [makes rat-tat noises]
- Jeremy Brown: Robin the Hood... ROBIN HOOD hadn't been born yet; he appeared in the Middle Ages!
- Ranjeet Singh: How can he be in middle age if he has not yet been born?
- Jeremy Brown: Ranjeet, can you give us a noun, please?
- Ranjeet Singh: Idiot!
- Jeremy Brown: Idiot? Surely you could have thought of something else?
- Ranjeet Singh: I could have said Muslim.
- [Miss Courtney wants a student from Mr Brown's class to present a bouquet to Her Majesty]
- Maximillian Papandrious: Hi want to do that! Please let me do that!
- Miss Courtney: It is customary for the bouquet to be presented by a LADY...
- Giovanni Cupello: With a-that skirt, who's a-gonna know the difference?
- Maximillian Papandrious: Hokay, step houtside!
- Jeremy Brown: Miss Courtney.
- Miss Courtney: Mr. Brown. Is this another one of your foreign students?
- Jeremy Brown: He's an ATC.
- Miss Courtney: I don't care what nationality he is. It's time you were in the classroom.
- Fforbes-Ffortescue: Madame, my name is Fforbes Ffortescue.
- Jeremy Brown: He's hyphenated.
- Miss Courtney: How unfortunate.
- Fforbes-Ffortescue: I'm here from the Town Hall. We've had some news from the Palace.
- Miss Courtney: Victoria or Crystal?
- Fforbes-Ffortescue: Buckingham.
- Jeremy Brown: In view of the occasion, it would seem appropriate to tell you a little of the history of our British Kings and Queens. It all started with the Norman Conquests.
- Anna Schmidt: I have seen that on the television. Very funny English play.
- Jeremy Brown: I'm referring to the actual invasion of England by William of Normandy. It was 1066.
- Juan Cervantes: Wrong!
- Jeremy Brown: I beg your pardon.
- Juan Cervantes: 1066... maybe 1056.
- Jeremy Brown: It was 1066.
- Juan Cervantes: No, cannot be 1066. Sixty minutes in one hour. 1066 is six minutes past eleven.
- Jeremy Brown: 1066 was the year.
- Juan Cervantes: It's all right.