Mind Your Language (TV Series)

No Flowers by Request (1979)

Ricardo Montez: Juan Cervantes

Quotes 

• Juan Cervantes : [stricken with indigestion]  My stomach, she is downside up!

• Miss Courtney : [about Mr Brown]  How could he break his leg by missing just one step?

  Juan Cervantes : [pointing to a long flight of stairs]  Step he miss, top step...

• Juan Cervantes : Mr Brown is dead?

  [breaks down crying] 

• [Juan pays a visit to Mr Brown in the hospital] 

  Juan Cervantes : Hey, Buenos Dias!

  Jeremy Brown : Go away.

• Danielle Favre : [concerned]  What is it Juan?

  Juan Cervantes : [groaning]  I am going to be sick.

  Giovanni Cupello : [shocked]  Holy ravioli! you've changed your religion! Hey, the Pope's not going to like that!

  Ranjeet Singh : I am welcoming you like a brother, but first you must be wearing the turban.

  Juan Cervantes : What's the matter, you all crazy? I am sick in my stomach.

  [pulls out thermometer] 

  Juan Cervantes : I am going to see if I have fever.

• Jeremy Brown : The question is not about those sort of customs. It means the things we British do that are peculiar to us.

  Juan Cervantes : Ah! Speak English!

• Miss Courtney : You are all Philistines!

  Ali Nadim : Oh No! I am Pakistan!

  Juan Cervantes : I am Spain!

• Juan Cervantes : Si señor, I pick subject.

  Jeremy Brown : There's only one left. It's Hobson's choice.

  Juan Cervantes : Not Hobson's choice. British cumtoms.

• Miss Courtney : Mr Cervantes.

  Juan Cervantes : Si señora.

  Miss Courtney : What do the letters AC mean?

  Juan Cervantes : Por favor?

  Miss Courtney : What does AC mean?

  Juan Cervantes : Four.

  Miss Courtney : AC has nothing to do with four.

  Juan Cervantes : Sure, AC spade, AC heart, AC diamond, and AC the other one!

  Miss Courtney : AC means alternating current.

• Juan Cervantes : We bring you some flowers.

  Jeremy Brown : Ah well, you shouldn't have spent money on flowers for me.

  Juan Cervantes : I don't spend money. We already bought them for your funeral.

• Juan Cervantes : Hello! Would you please tell me how is Mr Brown?

  Sister : Mr Brown? Could I have the Christian name, please?

  Juan Cervantes : Sure, Juan.

  Sister : Juan... Is this Spanish?

  Juan Cervantes : No no no no no. I am Spanish!

  Sister : I see. Juan is Spanish for John, isn't it?

  Juan Cervantes : Si señora.

  Sister : Would you hold on for a moment, please.

  Juan Cervantes : Si si.

  Sister : Brown John... Are you a relative?

  Juan Cervantes : No no, just a friend.

  Sister : Well, I'm afraid I have some rather bad news for you.

  Juan Cervantes : You mean Mr Brown is worst?

  Sister : He had a heart attack during the night.

  Juan Cervantes : Oh Santa Maria! You mean Mr Brown is dead!