- Ira Buchman: What's it worth to you?
- Ethics Professor: Excuse me?
- Ira Buchman: Come on, I know how much you professors pull in. Name your price. It's got to come in handy. I mean, how much can you make teaching? What do you teach?
- Ethics Professor: Ethics.
- Jamie Buchman: That's so sweet.
- Paul Buchman: What?
- Jamie Buchman: I can't believe you did this.
- Paul Buchman: What did I do?
- Jamie Buchman: You remembered what I said about the cafeteria and having nobody to sit with. You are the sweetest man in the whole world.
- Lisa Stemple: How are we gonna stall her?
- Paul Buchman: Trip her. Tell her you got a problem you gotta talk about.
- Lisa Stemple: I don't have any problems
- Paul Buchman: I'm looking at you, I see five problems.