Lizzie McGuire (TV Series)

Misadventures in Babysitting (2001)

Hilary Duff: Lizzie McGuire

Photos 

Quotes 

• Lizzie : Kate babysits? Since when does Kate babysit? Oh, why don't they just make her queen of the world and be done with it.

  Gordo : Babysitting sounds like a pretty sweet gig. Why don't you do it?

  Lizzie : I don't babysit. I get baby-sat.

  Miranda : And plus, babysitting jobs are hard to get. Parents want to make sure you're mature enough.

  Gordo : Well, I guess Kate sort of does give off some visual signals which imply a biologically nuturing capability...

  Miranda : We get it, Gordo. She's stacked.

  Gordo : Yes. Yes, she is.

• Lizzie : When will I be old enough to trust? When I'm 50?

  Sam McGuire : Maybe. We'll see.

• Lizzie : Okay, Gordo. Imagine you live in a boring suburb where all the houses look alike and everybody's predictable.

  Gordo : I do live in a boring suburb where all the houses look alike and everyone's predictable. Thank you.

  Lizzie : Okay, but if you could pick any business you wanted on Main Street, what would it be?

  Gordo : A bookstore containing the works of Navajo and Greek philosophers, a coffeehouse where people only discussed music and politics, a thousand-foot water slide ending in a swim-up counter where they serve free deep-fried pizza and Tyra Banks would be the mayor. I've given this a lot of thought.

• Lizzie : Gordo, can you get him to quit that?

  Gordo : You're in charge. You do it.

  Lizzie : Could you at least help? You didn't come here to watch TV on the couch.

  Gordo : Fine. I'll watch TV in your room.

• Miranda : [about their school project]  Where do they come up with these moronic assignments?

  Lizzie : The Moronic Assignment Study Guide. It's like this thick.

  Gordo : Let me guess. That's how tall Tom Cruise is.

  Miranda : Tom Cruise isn't short. He just has small bones.

• Lizzie : This had better come out of the carpet, Matt.

  [to Miranda] 

  Lizzie : What'd you give him grape juice for? I told you ginger ale. At least ginger ale isn't purple.

  Miranda : Grape juice was the only thing that would shut him up. He won't do a thing you say.

  Lizzie : Matt, go upstairs, change your shirt and get cleaned up now.

  Matt McGuire : No.

  Miranda : See?

  Lizzie : Zip it!

  Miranda : Why should I? He won't.

  Lizzie : Matt, starting right now, you do everything I tell you or I'll tell Mom and Dad.

  Matt McGuire : Nuh-uh. You want Mom and Dad to think you're a good babysitter, so you're going to say things went great.

  Lizzie : Then I'll squash you like a bug instead.

  Matt McGuire : Then I'll tell Mom and Dad. Face it. I'm in charge here.

  Lizzie : No. I'm in charge here.

  Gordo : Matt, what do you say we go upstairs and find you a clean shirt?

  Matt McGuire : Okay.

  Lizzie : How come he does what you say?

  Gordo : Well, I'm an older male. He's impressed by me.

  Lizzie : Well, I'm in charge here and he's supposed to do what I say, not what you say.

  Gordo : Who cares who says to do it? He needs a new shirt. He's as sticky as the floor of a movie theater.

• Jo McGuire : Oh, Debbie Gotchalk called. She can't babysit tomorrow night.

  Sam McGuire : Well, is there someone else we can get?

  Lizzie : Oh, oh, don't get that Olivia Skivin. She makes us listen to country-western non-stop.

  Matt McGuire : Not Mrs. Harvey. She smells dead.

  Jo McGuire : Well, we're not going for Tammy up the street 'cause she makes more an hour than I do.

  Sam McGuire : No way we're going with Mrs. Jaffey. Who lets a 10-year-old boy drink an entire quart of maple syrup?

  Matt McGuire : I liked her.

• Kate Sanders : Hey, Gordo, do you know where the nearest Software Shack is?

  Gordo : Yeah. It's over on Collins Street.

  Kate Sanders : Would they have that software that designs cities and towns and stuff?

  Gordo : You mean CyberTown Maker? They should.

  Lizzie : Okay, Kate, we're supposed to do this assignment ourselves.

  Kate Sanders : Whatever.

  Lizzie : You're supposed to use your imagination, not have some computer do it for you. Gordo, why didn't you tell me there was a program like that?

• Sam McGuire : [about Lizzie babysitting]  Sweetheart, you're just not ready yet. This is a big responsibility.

  Lizzie : You've always told me I can do anything if I set my mind to it, honey. And I've set my mind to this. I can do it.

  Jo McGuire : We do say that, Sam.

• Sam McGuire : Lizzie, I added some numbers to the emergency phone list. Also, I've moved all the cleaners out from under the kitchen sink. And whatever you do, do not open the door for anybody.

  Lizzie : And I won't follow the trail of bread crumbs to the gingerbread witch's house. Dad, don't worry.