- [first lines]
- Truly: [reading note on paper airplane Howard has thrown through the door] Hen. "Help. I'm alarmed. Howard."
- Clegg: Ah, ha-ha-ha-ha. Hee hee. Ah-ha. What's he alarmed about?
- Truly: You know Howard; there's always something.
- Clegg: Well, he can't have set the place on fire. I mean he, he would have said something, wouldn't he?
- Howard: [as he falls past the door] Aaaaaaaaaah.
- Truly: Why don't we ask him? I think I just saw him passing.
- Clegg: [opening the Dutch door] Oh. Oh dear, oh dear. Have you hurt anything?
- Howard: We, it feels like everything.
- Clegg: Yeah, well don't let any bits fall on the floor because I've just cleared up.
- Truly: I know the stairs are slower, Howard, but um...
- Howard: I was trying to attract your attention.
- Clegg: Oh, well you did that, you got our attention all right.
- Howard: I must have leaned out a bit too far.
- Truly: Bit eh. I think I'd be inclined to describe it as a lot too far.
- Clegg: [chuckles] Oh. Can I get you anything? perhaps a brain transplant.
- Howard: No, she never went off.
- Truly: What never went off?
- Howard: The alarm. Pearl's had an alarm installed. It's terrible.
- Truly: What's terrible about an alarm? It's a wise precaution against intruders.
- Howard: Tha's not what this is for. She's got it fixed so it goes off when I sneak out.
- Clegg: That is tricky. That's the crown jewels *and you* safe from being tampered with.
- Howard: I feel trapped.
- Truly: What do you mean, trapped? You've just beaten it.
- Howard: Well, I can't be leaving that way all the time.