Last of the Summer Wine (TV Series)
The Frenchies Are Coming (2003)
Robert Fyfe: Howard
Quotes
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[first lines]
Truly : [reading note on paper airplane Howard has thrown through the door] Hen. "Help. I'm alarmed. Howard."
Clegg : Ah, ha-ha-ha-ha. Hee hee. Ah-ha. What's he alarmed about?
Truly : You know Howard; there's always something.
Clegg : Well, he can't have set the place on fire. I mean he, he would have said something, wouldn't he?
Howard : [as he falls past the door] Aaaaaaaaaah.
Truly : Why don't we ask him? I think I just saw him passing.
Clegg : [opening the Dutch door] Oh. Oh dear, oh dear. Have you hurt anything?
Howard : We, it feels like everything.
Clegg : Yeah, well don't let any bits fall on the floor because I've just cleared up.
Truly : I know the stairs are slower, Howard, but um...
Howard : I was trying to attract your attention.
Clegg : Oh, well you did that, you got our attention all right.
Howard : I must have leaned out a bit too far.
Truly : Bit eh. I think I'd be inclined to describe it as a lot too far.
Clegg : [chuckles] Oh. Can I get you anything? perhaps a brain transplant.
Howard : No, she never went off.
Truly : What never went off?
Howard : The alarm. Pearl's had an alarm installed. It's terrible.
Truly : What's terrible about an alarm? It's a wise precaution against intruders.
Howard : Tha's not what this is for. She's got it fixed so it goes off when I sneak out.
Clegg : That is tricky. That's the crown jewels *and you* safe from being tampered with.
Howard : I feel trapped.
Truly : What do you mean, trapped? You've just beaten it.
Howard : Well, I can't be leaving that way all the time.