Joan of Arcadia (TV Series)
The Cat (2004)
Amber Tamblyn: Joan Girardi
Quotes
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Joan Girardi : Last night, my mom's aunt made us chant some Indian nature prayer she learned in New Mexico.
Adam Rove : Sounds cool.
Joan Girardi : Yeah, until you have to pose like a deer while she dances around you waving snake teeth. My dad was really happy about that.
Adam Rove : My aunt has this big thing on her neck. It used to freak me out, like she was growing another head.
Joan Girardi : What does that have to do with anything?
Adam Rove : We were talking about aunts, weren't we?
Joan Girardi : No, we were talking about me. Only two more days. My mom has this permanent serial killer smile glued to her face. I hope she makes it.
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Woman with Cats God : They'll be put to sleep if they're not adopted.
Joan Girardi : Looks like they could use the sleep.
Woman with Cats God : You could adopt one, Joan.
Joan Girardi : I hate cats. This you know.
Woman with Cats God : They were born on the streets, wild. They need a home.
Joan Girardi : How about I get a puppy?
[God shakes her head]
Joan Girardi : Hamster?
[another head shake]
Joan Girardi : Sea monkeys?
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Luke Girardi : Why would someone who has repeatedly claimed that she hates cats get a cat?
Joan Girardi : They were gonna kill it.
Kevin Girardi : But a cat?
Joan Girardi : I'm a puzzle, okay?
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Joan Girardi : Introducing the newest Girardi, Larry the cat.
Helen Girardi : You got a cat?
Joan Girardi : Yeah.
Aunt Olive : It's wild, isn't it?
Joan Girardi : Uh, yeah.
Aunt Olive : Well, get rid of it. They can't be tamed.
Joan Girardi : No, the-the pamphlet shows you how to domesticate them.
Kevin Girardi : Tell that to Siegfried.
Luke Girardi : No, I think it was Roy.
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Luke Girardi : Have a cricket. Good for sex.
Helen Girardi : Luke.
Adam Rove : I'm going in.
Aunt Olive : Oh, good for you.
Joan Girardi : Ew! This is like Arcadia "Fear Factor".
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Joan Girardi : You two look deep into something.
Grace Polk : Eh, Madame Curie here is just trying to recruit me for the science fair again.
Luke Girardi : It's just, the competition's fierce and, you know...
Joan Girardi : Nodding off.
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Judith Montgomery : You don't want to be a cat person, Jo-Jo. They're antisocial, sexually frustrated introverts...
Joan Girardi : Oh, stow the shrink-isms. I'm taking care of one of God's creatures.
Grace Polk : Dude, we eat most of his little creatures.
Judith Montgomery : And your aunt eats the rest, from what I hear.
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Adam Rove : Your mom is driving me nuts with this pop art assignment. This is...
Joan Girardi : Try sharing the same DNA with her.
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Adam Rove : If you haven't found anyone to take care of Larry, I can.
Joan Girardi : Oh, but your dad's allergic.
Adam Rove : Oh, I'll keep him in the shed.
Joan Girardi : Thanks, but the pamphlet says he needs to sleep with someone in the same room at night.
Adam Rove : Well, I fall asleep working out there all the time anyway.
Joan Girardi : Really?
Adam Rove : Yeah.
Joan Girardi : [kissing him] Thank you. He's so sweet. That's a lie, but thank you.
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Joan Girardi : I lost him. I tried everything. I swear. It's just my aunt... he's probably just under a bus somewhere, and it's all my fault.
Woman with Cats God : Running away, it's his nature.
Joan Girardi : But I thought I was supposed to change him.
Woman with Cats God : Why do you think he was the one who was supposed to change?