- Chief: There's no telling where they'll be able to infiltrate next. May be even the Pentagon.
- Maxwell Smart: You're right, Chief. But even if they do get a man into the Pentagon, that's not saying he'll be able to get out. I remember one of our own agents was lost in there for three days.
- Chief: Three days? Max, no agent could be that confused.
- Maxwell Smart: Well, let me see now. I went in on a Friday...
- Maxwell Smart: Chief, when was the last time I beat you at chess?
- Chief of Control: You've never beaten me at chess, Max.
- Maxwell Smart: That long ago, eh?
- Devonshire: You thought?
- [thumps statue of a panther with his fist]
- Devonshire: KAOS doesn't pay you to think, you men were send here to obey.
- Woman Agent: Tell me, Max, where does your Chief go on wednesday nights?
- Maxwell Smart: Well, I'm afraid you'll have to be a little more specific than that, Shirley. What wednesday night?
- Woman Agent: How about next Wednesday night?
- Maxwell Smart: You're wasting your time. That's classified information.
- Woman Agent: Then what are you doing next Wednesday night, Maxie? Maybe we could do it together.
- Maxwell Smart: Well, I'm afraid not. You see, I'm guarding the Chief at a concert next Wednesday night.
- Maxwell Smart: [the Chief raises the Cone of Silence] Well what's the matter, Chief?
- Chief of Control: What's the matter? Didn't you hear that echo?
- Maxwell Smart: Didn't I hear what?
- Chief of Control: Echo, echo, echo!
- Maxwell Smart: Oh yes, I heard it that time.