George Lopez (TV Series)

She Drives Me Crazy (2004)

George Lopez: George Lopez

Photos 

Quotes 

• George Lopez : [shows Carmen a calendar]  What's the date circled?

  Carmen Lopez : My 18th birthday...

  George Lopez : I circled that, because that's going to be the worst day of my life.

  Carmen Lopez : Oh... why's there a little potato next to it?

  George Lopez : Actually that's a boot, I was angry at you one day and I was going to kick you out.

• George Lopez : [imitating Carmen]  I hate you! Stomp, stomp, slam. You're the worst dad ever! Stomp, stomp, slam. Nobody cares about my feelings! Stomp, trip, fall!

• George Lopez : Okay everyone, listen up, as you all know, this afternoon my mom had a court date. The judge decided to be creative and sentenced her to public humiliation. Now I don't want anyone to panic at what I'm about to say, Mom, take it off.

  [guys moan and cringe] 

  George Lopez : [Benny removes her jacket, revealing a sign on her chest]  "Ask me how I endangered my grandchildren's lives." Turn around so I can see the answer.

  Ernie : Bend over. I'll give it to you.

• George Lopez : Mom! What were you thinking?

  Angie Lopez : Where is your judgement? How could you drink with a 15-year-old girl behind the wheel?

  Benny : Come on. I was choking on a French fry and there was nothing else to drink. It was just one sip. George, come on. You of all people know that I can drink a beer and watch a kid.

  George Lopez : What are you talking about? You never watched me. The neighbors had to pitch in to build a fence to keep me from crawling in the street!

• Carmen Lopez : Should I go the usual way home?

  George Lopez : No, I want to go down Van Nuys, across Magnolia, then up Reseda.

  Carmen Lopez : Oh, that's cool. We're taking the major streets so I can practice passing.

  George Lopez : No, that way we pass three hospitals and a church in case I need last rites.