George Lopez (TV Series)

George Gets Assisterance (2005)

Eva LaRue: Linda Lorenzo

Photos 

Quotes 

• Linda Lorenzo : [after discovering she's been adopted]  This morning I woke up and I was the only child of two loving Italian parents. Now it's 11:00 pm and I'm a Mexican.

• Linda Lorenzo : I'll arrange Max to retake the test and then maybe he won't do so well, and I'll be forced to put him back in special ed.

  George Lopez : Wow, you're already holding one of your own on your own back. Congratulations, Linda, you are Mexican.

• Linda Lorenzo : [to George]  What are my real parents like?

  George Lopez : Well, your father's easy. He left Mom before you were born, I tracked him down last year, I punched him in the face, he asked me for a kidney, and then he died.

  Linda Lorenzo : And my mother?

  George Lopez : Oh, she's hard to describe in a few words. She's a short, bitter drunk... actually, that about covers it.

• George Lopez : Max really needs that special ed program.

  Linda Lorenzo : I can't put Max back in special ed.

  George Lopez : What? I just introduced you to your real mother.

  Linda Lorenzo : And now I owe you?

• Linda Lorenzo : [to George]  Why don't you want me to meet her? Are you jealous? You don't want to share your mother with me?

  George Lopez : Share? I'll trade! I can be Italian.

  [in an Italian accent] 

  George Lopez : Try the canollis! Forget about it! I know a guy! Whatcha! Badd-bing-ho!

  Linda Lorenzo : That's a stereotype.

  George Lopez : What do you care? You're a Mexican.