- Sergeant Shishka: Urkel, Winslow, you are not on my list of new recruits.
- Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Oh well...
- Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: You mean to tell me that the Army screwed up the paper work again. Gosh I bet that's never happened before.
- Sergeant Shishka: Don't insult my Army. I love my Army. I'll take this up later with the Lieutenant.
- Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I don't believe I've had the pleasure of...
- Sergeant Shishka: Sergeant Robert Shishka!
- Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Hey, you know, your name backwards is Shishka Bob!
- Waldo Geraldo Faldo: [writing a letter] Dear Mom, I'm in the army now.
- [pauses and thinks]
- Waldo Geraldo Faldo: I'm not behind a plow.
- [pauses and thinks]
- Waldo Geraldo Faldo: I'll never get rich, by digging a ditch.
- [pauses and thinks]
- Waldo Geraldo Faldo: I'm in the army now.