- Lydia Grant: Mr. Dyrenforth, is this really necessary? I feel like we're dissecting this man.
- Mr. Dyrenforth: On the contrary, Miss Grant, we're trying to put him back together.
- Mr. Shorofsky: Bu putting him under a microscope?
- Mrs. Berg: Doesn't seem fair.
- Reggie Higgins: Mendenhall, for the last time: a horse is a horse. A jackass, on the other hand, is a cross between a horse and a mule.
- Dwight Mendenhall: What happens when you cross a mule and a jackass?
- Reggie Higgins: Nothing, they both just have fun.
- Mr. Dyrenforth: The only thing that's holding those books is red tape.
- Mrs. Berg: Well, I think it's time that someone went down to the Board and kicked some butt.
- Mr. Dyrenforth: Mrs. Berg, I'm shocked!
- Mrs. Berg: You're also without books.
- Dusty Tyler: I mean... I just don't feel like singing any more. Is that a crime?
- Mr. William Quigley: Is that a crime? Would it be a crime if the sun never rose? If the ocean stopped roaring? If the stars never showed themselves in the night sky?
- Dusty Tyler: Yeah, I guess.
- Mr. William Quigley: There you are.
- Mr. Bob Dyrenforth: Mr. Quigley, could we speak with you for a moment, please?
- Mr. William Quigley: Well does it have to be now? I was really looking forward to shredding the rest of these I.Q. tests.